Four Bomb Mr. Cranky Movie Reviews
|Bad News Bears||0|
If I had to guess, I'd say that director Richard Linklater was one of those nerdy kids who always got picked last and sat on the bench for every team he ever played for. His understanding of sports might play well on the Knitting Channel, but here he looks like a complete idiot.
|07/22/2005 - 21:18|
Every single character in "Bandits" is eccentric, which is the amateur screenwriter's way of saying, "I don't have a real story, so I've made all the characters really weird for your entertainment."
|10/12/2001 - 21:23|
"Barb Wire" is unlikley to spark heated intellectual debate at film schools anytime soon.
|05/03/1996 - 21:26|
|Barney's Great Adventure||0|
I love you. You love me. We both love the in-out, in-out.
|03/30/1998 - 21:30|
If an utter lack of effort had its own award show, the people involved with "Baseketball" could stand proudly next to the Yugo engineers and Monica Lewinsky's personal trainer as deserving nominees.
|07/31/1998 - 21:40|
|Basic Instinct 2||0|
While Stone may look good for her age, the reality is that such behavior in the real world would likely leave her less sexy and irresistible, and more partially decomposed.
|03/31/2006 - 21:37|
I know what I don't like.
|08/09/1996 - 21:44|
I really should dynamite this movie just for forcing me to watch Aerosmith's Steven Tyler try to act. The dude plays himself and I didn't believe it -- that's how bad he is.
|03/04/2005 - 21:55|
|Because of Winn-Dixie||0|
There's saccharine writing and then there's writing that, if you could liquefy it and inject it into the five-year-olds watching this thing, would launch them into space. This is the latter.
|02/18/2005 - 15:14|
If you want to see what happens when independent filmmakers have too much money and don't know what to do with it, just go see "Bee Season."
|11/17/2005 - 15:20|
|Beyond the Sea||0|
Spacey would have looked more believable playing Joan Rivers. I was convinced this was a science fiction film for a while because Spacey was wearing so much makeup I thought he was an android.
|12/29/2004 - 15:48|
There is some serious venom spewing from this movie, probably because screenwriters Steve Franks and Tim Herlihy are beginning to realize their only talent in life consists of riding their friend's coattails through the Garden of Mediocrity.
|06/25/1999 - 15:55|
|Big Momma's House||0|
The sort of stupidity that goes into making a movie like "Big Momma's House" is unfathomable.
|06/02/2000 - 16:02|
|Big Momma's House 2||0|
Sometimes a movie's mediocrity so overwhelms you that you can't think straight and you essentially leave the theater having blocked whole thing out.
|01/27/2006 - 16:03|
This movie comes apart faster than nap time at the Ritalin rehab.
|04/05/2002 - 16:10|
The only real rubber burned during "Biker Boyz" was off of my sneakers as I sprinted out of the theater.
|01/31/2003 - 16:15|
|Blast from the Past||3|
Notice the biblical reference? Would it be less obvious if one of the ushers made you eat a Bible?
|02/09/1999 - 19:22|
Director Ted Demme is a moron, and here's why.
|04/06/2001 - 19:38|
|Blue Brothers 2000||0|
If I had wanted to watch two hours of "VH-1," guesswhat? I would have stayed home and done that. For free.
|02/06/1998 - 20:17|
Here's a valuable lesson for girls everywhere: Abandoning your dreams to have sex with a football player pays handsome dividends indeed.
|08/16/2002 - 19:44|