Four Bomb Mr. Cranky Movie Reviews

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Cold Creek Manor 0

I gave this movie an extra bomb just because I hate Mike Figgis.

09/19/2003 - 19:42
Confessions of a Teenage Drama Queen 0

This had all the drama of a traffic jam.

02/20/2004 - 19:52
Connie and Carla0

This film appears to be something of an homage to "Some Like it Hot", which is kind of like saying that a bum taking a crap in a dumpster is an homage to "Star Wars".

04/16/2004 - 19:56
Contempt0

"Contempt" is a vile piece of crap.

08/21/2001 - 20:01
Coyote Ugly 0

Can you believe that somebody in the Bruckheimer fold actually suggested they make a PG-13 "Showgirls" and it happened?

04/04/2000 - 20:35
Crocodile Dundee in L.A. 0

Naturally, Dundee and friends tool around L.A. in a Subaru Outback, just in case you were curious whether this was the film where Hogan finally discovers a capacity for shame.

04/20/2001 - 20:57
Cruel Intentions0

Ooooh, Buffy be bad.

03/05/1999 - 21:06
Cursed0

Apparently, this was a production fraught with problems. It shows.

02/25/2005 - 21:16
D3: The Mighty Ducks 0

I was stunned beyond words at the originality of the screenplay.

10/04/1996 - 21:51
Dance with Me0

It was as if Hollywood wolfed down a nice "Strictly Ballroom" and"Shall We Dance" sandwich, allowed its body to digest all the nutrients, and then rammed a minicam into its large intestine to see the creeping amalgam of resultant waste.

08/21/1998 - 21:55
Daredevil0

Affleck probably got the part of the blind superhero because he was the only actor too inebriated to duck when the producers flung objects at his head.

02/14/2003 - 14:05
Dead Heat0

Treat Williams and Joe Piscopo are cops and partners and they quickly discover that zombies are conducting a burglary spree in Los Angeles.

08/22/2000 - 14:33
Dead Man on Campus0

Lots funnier than the movie is the actual admission by producer GaleAnne Hurd and first-time director Alan Cohn that they had a "vision" for this film. A "vision"?

08/21/1998 - 14:39
Denise Calls Up0

Stated simply: A movie where the characters only interact over the phone is not interesting. It's boring.

03/29/1996 - 15:03
Derailed0

If the plot is any indication, the filmmakers behind this piece of crap aren't nearly smart enough to make a plausible film noir. Hell, they probably don't even know what film noir is. So, that leaves us with the conclusion that the filmmakers thought they were making a compelling thriller, which means that they're stupid.

11/11/2005 - 15:07
Desperate Measures0

The villain is beyond evil, yet the audience is forced to root for him because everybody else on screen has the combined intelligence of warm spit.

01/30/1998 - 15:31
Deuce Bigalow 0

The incompetent who directed this film is Mike Mitchell, who's probably some buddy of (Rob) Schneider and Adam Sandler, and whose main talent up until this point was cleaning potato chip crumbs off Sandler's couch.

12/10/1999 - 15:36
Deuces Wild0

It's nice to see most of the cast of "The Sopranos" getting other work. It's good to know they're challenging themselves with other Italian Mafia-type roles in the off season.

05/03/2002 - 15:39
Diabolique 0

Director Jeremiah Chechik's new version of this film does a magnificent job of sucking the life right out of the old version.

08/22/1998 - 15:54
Disturbing Behavior 0

Like one hopes there might be a God, one also hopes that among the millions of freakish teenage boys who forgo school, food and sleep to masturbate hourly in their dank rooms wallpapered with Katie Holmes posters, there is one -- just one -- who will be able to recognize the utter lack of ingenuity involved in "Disturbing Behavior."

07/24/1998 - 16:25