One Bomb Mr. Cranky Movie Reviews
|The City of Lost Children||0|
The second you see the midget, the gig is up and the whole premise of the film is blown.
|12/15/2000 - 22:40|
|The Dark Knight||26|
This whole ethical conundrum is, of course, complete bullshit, which means that “The Dark Knight” is complete bullshit.
|09/16/2008 - 16:12|
I guess because director Martin Scorsese hasn't had any recent luck, box-office or award-wise, with his own films, he's decided to go and steal something successful from Asia.
|10/06/2006 - 15:05|
This film could have used a whole lot less back-story and a whole lot more projectile vomiting.
|12/26/2000 - 20:28|
|The Fog (2005)||0|
You'll be agog watching "The Fog."
|10/14/2005 - 16:03|
Truth may be stranger than fiction sometimes;here it's only slightly more boring.
|12/18/1998 - 00:10|
Take Mr. Cranky's one-question quiz.
|08/27/1997 - 20:39|
|The Great Escape||1|
Then they sat around and tickled each other's testicle hairs while their prisoners dug so many tunnels under their camp the Germans could have financed the war by opening up a theme park.
|08/27/2001 - 22:03|
Essentially an epic extension of the comedic penis' penetration into the mainstream
|06/08/2009 - 22:03|
"The Hours" is all about lesbians and anybody who knows anything about movies knows that the main reason you put lesbians in a movie is very simple: hot lesbian sex.
|01/24/2003 - 20:46|
"The Hulk" is not just crap -- it's green crap, and if that's not a bad sign, I don't know what is.
|06/20/2003 - 21:07|
you'll find that the only action is in the middle of audience, in the middle of the burgeoning kiddie riot.
|11/05/2004 - 21:22|
This Ernest Hemingway story has been remade several times. What people don't understand is this: If the story was any good, it would never have been remade because it would have been right the first time.
|09/01/1997 - 21:37|
|The King's Speech||6|
Let's face it – Hollywood is running out of ideas when it comes to casting male leads in roles where they overcome some form of disability in order to win an Oscar.
|01/09/2011 - 12:19|
|The Lady and the Tramp||0|
Eventually, I got bored with the DVD and spent the rest of the evening licking my own genitals and crapping in the neighbor's yard.
|09/02/1998 - 01:47|
Presently, you begin to wonder whether the concessionaire accidentally slipped you a heaping cup of Robitussin over crushed ice instead of Pepsi.
|08/04/1999 - 15:51|
|The Little Mermaid||3|
This film is perverted.
|09/03/2000 - 02:51|
|The Maltese Falcon||0|
This film is no more than candy for a slow mind.
|09/04/1997 - 20:44|
Did the Wachowski brothers really sit down and decide to spend a hundred million dollars making their dream sci-fi film, then proceed to hire a guy with all the acting range of a carp?
|03/31/1999 - 21:29|
|The Matrix Reloaded||0|
So after turning self-consciously intellectual, this is what the newly reclusive Wachowski brothers bring us? Andy (the smart one) and Larry (the slow one) serve up a second-rate humanistic philosophy that will have you wondering whether Gandhi's secret dream might have been to dance around in slow motion and pump bullets into everything that moved.
|05/15/2003 - 21:30|