Three Bomb Mr. Cranky Movie Reviews
Imagine for a moment that you're a small-town loser who has parlayed his dreams of fame and fortune into a snow shoveling business.
|02/09/1996 - 07:35|
Obviously, director Hettie MacDonald is trying to make a statement about the wonder of love, whether heterosexual or homosexual. Nice try.
|10/09/1996 - 07:38|
If you take this quiz and get less than four out of four, you'll no doubt enjoy all the surprise twists and turns in "Beauty Shop."
|03/30/2005 - 07:39|
|Beavis and Butt-head Do America||0|
Certainly Beavis' palcould have just as easily been named Ferdinand or Gustav, offering (director Mike) Judge the opportunity to explore phallic continuities across cultures and time frames.
|12/20/1996 - 07:42|
If Elizabeth Hurley is the devil and she offers me seven wishes in exchange for my soul, I know what my first wish is going to be.
|10/20/2000 - 15:18|
|Before Night Falls||0|
I swear to God, sometimes you just have to wonder what Roger Ebert has been smoking.
|01/26/2001 - 15:25|
|Behind Enemy Lines||0|
Since Gene Hackman has three movies in release within four weeks of each other and Owen Wilson has two, I'm assuming that "Behind Enemy Lines" was the one that was rushed.
|11/30/2001 - 15:26|
This will probably come as a huge shock to Jonathan Demme and Oprah Winfrey, but "long" does not equal "important."
|10/16/1998 - 15:29|
The film turns into something like "The Caine Mutiny" meets "Poltergeist" if both those films were exceptionally bad and boring.
|10/24/2002 - 15:30|
|Best in Show||0|
"Oh, let's come up with an idea, do up an outline, and invite all our friends to film a movie in which they will simply improvise their lines."
|03/01/2001 - 15:34|
|Beverly Hills Ninja||0|
Not only is Farley fat -- he's sweaty, stupid and full of the kindof manic energy usually found only in lab rats who've been pumped so full of speed that they eventually explode.
|01/17/1997 - 15:43|
|Beyond the Mat||0|
If you're interested in learning about wrestling, you're an idiot. If you believe that wrestling isn't staged, you're an idiot. If you've ever attended a wrestling event, you're an idiot. And if you're one of these idiots who lets your idiot children watch this stuff on television, you should be sterilized.
|03/17/1999 - 15:48|
|Big Fat Liar||0|
In case one precocious 14-year-old isn't nauseating enough, this film heaps on two.
|02/08/2002 - 15:56|
In the course of having their business destroyed by their competitor, Primo and Secondo learn that they have each other. How sweet.
|09/20/1996 - 16:04|
One set of understanding parents, and the whole universe of British feelgood filmmaking is down the toilet.
|11/29/2000 - 16:16|
If you're a lonely loser and Nicole Kidman shows up out of nowhere to marry you, do you send her back?
|02/01/2002 - 16:18|
Kevin Hooks, who's still walking despite having directed "StrictlyBusiness," "Fled," and "Passenger 57," manages to turn truck-driving into a sport.
|05/01/1998 - 16:24|
You can't exactly fault the Chinese for not taking the first flight over to theU.S. and catching whatever Jean-Claude Van Damme film happens to be playing.
|08/18/1996 - 16:29|
You might as well haveJonathan Taylor Thomas fight Wesley Snipes to the death.
|08/21/1998 - 16:39|
This movie is pretty much an indication that writer/director David S. Goyer has either given up on the "Blade" franchise or is trying to turn it into a permanent feature skit on "Saturday Night Live."
|12/08/2004 - 16:42|