Three Bomb Mr. Cranky Movie Reviews
With so much exposition to get through, there are sequences of the film that feel like someone reading page after page of the Old Testament out loud.
|03/09/2009 - 15:44|
Costner plays a character named the mariner who sails the Earth looking for things to trade with other sailors. He also drinks his own urine.
|07/28/1995 - 23:44|
"Wedding Crashers" is certainly some kind of accident.
|07/15/2005 - 23:35|
|What Women Want||0|
Honestly, how long would you spend masturbating in that situation?
|12/15/2000 - 21:00|
|What's the Worst That Could Happen?||0|
More of the mediocre SNL cast members could show up in this film.
|06/01/2001 - 20:57|
|Where the Heart Is||2|
If this film isn't the world's biggest advertisement for a government-subsidized "free birth control" program specific to the state of Oklahoma, I don't know what is.
|04/28/2000 - 20:49|
|Where the Money Is||0|
It's a typical film convention that doesn't work here any better than it ever did.
|05/31/2000 - 20:48|
|White Man's Burden||0|
Try and talk about the political implications of this film with someone of another race and you'll probably end up in a screaming match -- everybody's idea of a good time.
|12/01/1995 - 20:40|
|Who Is Cletis Tout||0|
RuPaul actually has a role in the film. Need I say more?
|12/21/2001 - 02:53|
|Wild Man Blues||0|
Given Allen's unique neuroses, the film seems to conclude that room service is the main thing keeping Soon Yi interested in boinking the Woodster. That and an occasional trip to Toys -R- Us.
|04/17/1997 - 02:35|
|Wild Wild West||0|
Why bother with film at all when transferring your masterpiece directly to Nintendo 64 and Taco Bell cups can be so much more economical and rewarding?
|06/30/1999 - 02:30|
I'll give this film some love, but only in tennis terms.
|09/17/2004 - 02:25|
|Win A Date with Tad Hamilton||0|
This perpetuates the myth that nice guys can finish first when all that ever happens to nice guys in the real world is that they get emotionally cornholed over and over again until they eventually die unfulfilled and bitter.
|01/23/2004 - 02:23|
I'm always impressed with Hollywood's ability to tell virtually any story through the eyes of a marketable white guy.
|06/14/2002 - 02:21|
It appears that the human race is getting its ass kicked by the planet Garfield.
|03/12/1999 - 02:19|
This film is billed as "Wes Craven Presents," which is Hollywood-speak for "Wes Craven would not direct this film, but this hack would."
|09/19/1997 - 23:14|
If Robert Towne, who penned "Chinatown," is such a screenwriting genius, somebody explain to me why this film ends twice.
|09/11/1998 - 23:13|
Is it possible that a character’s supposed biopic can leave us knowing even less about what makes him tick than when we first stepped into the theatre?
|05/01/2009 - 15:26|
As parodyfilms go, it's about as fresh and timely as "Mafia!" was during its day-and-a-half in theaters.
|08/21/1998 - 22:55|
By the time Xander snowboarded in front of the intentionally-caused avalanche, I started to wonder whether this was a comedy.
|08/09/2002 - 22:46|