Three Bomb Mr. Cranky Movie Reviews

MovieCommentssort iconBlurbCreated
Desert Blue0

This is one of those "quirky" films in which neither logic nor economics seems to factor.

12/22/2003 - 15:11
Deuce Bigalow: European Gigolo 1

The main goal … is to pack as many sex-act euphemisms, gay jokes, Asian jokes, and penis euphemisms into one 80-minute film as humanly possible.

08/12/2005 - 15:38

Long story short, if your movie is about the devil, and you call it "Devil," and there are only four characters trapped in a certain situation and one of them is the devil, well, game over – the movie sucks from the first minute.

09/25/2010 - 21:06

It's not clear how Andrew Fleming convinced anybody that what the summer movie season really needed was an ill-timed comedy about Watergate.

08/04/1999 - 16:11
Dickie Roberts: Former Child Star0

The excitement preceding a David Spade film is akin to the excitement preceding a traffic jam -- most of us look for some way around it.

09/05/2003 - 16:12
Die Hard with a Vengeance 0

Since McClane has survived every conceivable life-threatening situation under the sun, "Die Hard with a Vengeance" is forced to invent new, increasingly stupid ways to have him almost die.

05/19/1995 - 16:22
Dinner For Schmucks1

While it was amusing of you to completely waste the talent of Zach Galifianakis by restricting him to the role of a cape-wearing IRS employee, the idea that somehow a pet medium, a blind fencing expert and a national mustache champion are the cream of the weirdo crop was a bit of a let-down.

08/08/2010 - 02:23

Films are supposed to be made because somebody wants to tell a story, not because somebody wants to try out a new computer technique.

05/19/2000 - 16:23
Divine Secrets of the Ya-Ya Sisterhood 0

It's nice to know, at least if the film is any indication, that lifelong problems and seething resentment are easily cured by a good hug.

06/07/2002 - 16:26

These explanations are sprinkled with enough clever expletives to keep them amused while they're learning, sort of like wrapping your dog's deworming pill in a piece of ham.

11/12/1999 - 16:32
Don't Say a word 0

What, exactly, is the problem with grabbing Elisabeth and thumping on her until she talks?

09/28/2001 - 16:36

This movie owes more to "Aliens" and "Stargate" than Harriet Miers owes to George W. Bush.

10/21/2005 - 16:38
Double Jeopardy0

Apparently, some kid in this town has a lemonade stand where he also sells law degrees.

09/24/1999 - 16:47
Down in the Delta0

Angelou apparently thinks that her gift for molding wordsinto mental images is enough to qualify her to get behind the big bad camera and drive.

12/25/1998 - 16:52
Down Periscope0

This film might easily be described as "King Ralph on a Submarine."

03/01/1996 - 16:54
Dr. Dolittle0

Pants wet with the comprehension of mutual understanding, the executives suddenly stood tall and began chanting their new mantra: "More talking animals! More talking animals!"

06/26/1998 - 19:18
Dr. T and the Women 0

Wow. We haven't seen an acting stretch like this since Marlon Brando played a fat guy.

10/13/2000 - 19:20
Dracula 20001

If there's a message in the movie, it's that films like this ought to just go straight to video and not inflict their ungodly torture on us all.

12/22/2000 - 19:25
Dracula Untold3

No surprise really. Dracula Untold sucked the life out of me.

10/17/2014 - 20:25
Drive Me Crazy0

You mean they actually needed a written document to put this movie together?

10/01/1999 - 19:36