Three Bomb Mr. Cranky Movie Reviews
|American Pie 2||0|
Did any of these people make a single new friend in college?
|08/10/2001 - 20:34|
Here's the greater message of "American Psycho": Trick endings are for feebs.
|04/14/2000 - 20:36|
Maybe Steven Spielberg's next "important" film can be about kickingdogs or beating baby seals.
|12/10/1997 - 20:49|
Don't be fooled by the false advertising. This is not a thriller.
|05/18/2001 - 21:16|
|Anna and the King||0|
A proper English woman, Anna Leonowens, goes to Siam in the mid-nineteenth century and changes the course of Siamese history because King Mongkut has never tasted English pie.
|12/17/1999 - 21:37|
Nobody makes even the slightest attempt to use a Russian accent,which gives "Anna Karenina" all the cultural charm of a Japanese tourist trying to order a Whopper in a Moscow Burger King.
|04/04/1997 - 21:39|
|Anywhere But Here||0|
This is a nothing story that's mostly focused on the various stages of hissy fits that women tend to have.
|11/12/1999 - 03:28|
"Apt Pupil" looks like it should have taken three months to make, not three full years.
|10/23/1998 - 03:49|
|Around the World in 80 Days||0|
This is a film that tries to distract the viewer from its lack of a clear protagonist and slight racism with a litany of cameos so that the audience can blurt out every ten minutes or so, "Hey look, it's John Cleese!"
|06/16/2004 - 03:55|
|Art School Confidential||0|
It would have been nice if "Art School Confidential" had been kept strictly confidential.
|11/10/2006 - 03:59|
Fearing that a story or a plot might confuse some people, Donner drops us in on an action scene that looks like it was lifted from the middle of a different Sylvester Stallone flick.
|10/06/1995 - 14:53|
|Assault on Precinct 13||0|
There's definitely an assault in this film. Whether it's on the screen or on the audience is up for debate.
|01/19/2005 - 14:54|
|Austin Powers in Goldmember||0|
In an era when successful movies are not mere films so much as franchises, it becomes a valuable skill to tell when a franchise has "jumped the shark" and started that quick dive from fame to futility. For me, that point for the Austin Powers franchise was about five minutes into this movie.
|07/26/2002 - 15:21|
|Austin Powers: International Man of Mystery||0|
If "Austin Powers" is the best Meyers could do after four years of brainstorming, maybe next time he should take a forty-year hiatus -- on a desert island.
|05/02/1997 - 15:23|
Writer/Director/Producer John Singleton has been living in a swank mansion in Bel Aire with a pool, hot tub, five-car garage and a Peruvian housekeeper -- just what exactly does he know about life in the 'hood anymore?
|06/29/2001 - 21:07|
One cannot help but wonder whether this movie was Joel and Ethan Coen's idea of a practical joke.
|08/15/2001 - 21:31|
I like to think of this film as the prequel to "Showgirls."
|08/15/2000 - 21:36|
This pathetic bit of casting has led to a series of increasingly feminine Batmans; first Keaton, then Val Kilmer and then George Clooney. Who's next? RuPaul?
|08/15/2000 - 21:45|
Tommy Lee Jones as Two Face is the worst use of an Academy Award winning actor since Cher made her last fitness video.
|06/16/1995 - 21:49|
Inside every British person is a loud fart just waiting to get out.
|11/07/1997 - 07:31|