Three Bomb Mr. Cranky Movie Reviews
| Movie | Comments | Blurb | Created |
|---|---|---|---|
| The Importance of Being Earnest | 0 | The British make me sick. They make two kinds of films. | 07/04/2002 - 20:33 |
| The In-Laws | 0 | If you're a dumbass, do you take a chance on an original screenplay or do you play CYA and pull a script out of the vault that's already been done with some success so you can blame the inevitable failure on the director and actors? | 05/23/2003 - 20:44 |
| The Incredible Mr. Limpet | 0 | This film is sick. | 08/30/2000 - 21:20 |
| The Island | 0 | Bay's sins are all ones of excess. He's like a lab animal who has access to an orgasm button. | 07/22/2005 - 22:10 |
| The Jackal | 0 | In the original movie, the Jackal was at least smart. | 11/14/1997 - 06:03 |
| The Juror | 0 | "The Juror" has a host of surprises. Unfortunately, they're all comical. | 02/02/1996 - 20:08 |
| The King and I | 0 | Let's just say the animation quality is maybe a step above epileptics with crayons. | 09/01/1995 - 21:45 |
| The Lake House | 0 | Time travel movies are inevitably full of big holes and "The Lake House" is certainly no exception. The first flaw is that Keanu Reeves is in it. | 06/16/2006 - 01:52 |
| The Last Castle | 0 | This is Hollywood liberalism at its worst -- so paper thin that every political point is like watching a 10-foot tall stuffed Uncle Sam waving an American flag. | 10/19/2001 - 14:00 |
| The Last Days of Disco | 0 | Most directors wouldn't dare make a movie based on such flimsy subject matter. (Director Whit) Stillman, meanwhile, has found a way to make three. | 05/29/1998 - 14:10 |
| The Last Samurai | 0 | When Cruise's final words are expelled from this 148-minute slug, it's like being released from jail. | 12/05/2003 - 14:25 |
| The Legend of Bagger Vance | 0 | You only get to call something a sport when there's a real possibility of someone bleeding at the end. | 11/03/2000 - 15:12 |
| The Libertine | 0 | Seriously, is there a law somewhere that says that Malkovich has to be in every single film about sexual deviance? | 03/10/2006 - 15:31 |
| The Life Aquatic with Steve Zissou | 0 | Writer/director Wes Anderson is teetering on the precipice between humorous and interesting on one side and bizarre and meaningless on the other. | 12/25/2004 - 15:38 |
| The Lizzie McGuire Movie | 0 | Why does every sweet and wholesome female child star have a rack like a bronzed trophy case at a Miracle Gro melon contest? | 05/02/2003 - 02:59 |
| The Long Kiss Goodnight | 0 | After marrying Geena Davis, director Renny Harlin has been trying unsuccessfully to make sure her career doesn't go straight down the toilet. | 10/11/1996 - 20:34 |
| The Longest Yard | 0 | Sadly, this is what passes for genius in Hollywood these days. | 05/27/2005 - 20:36 |
| The Love Bug | 0 | There is a great discovery to be had by watching this 1969 movie: It's the original inspiration for "The Matrix." | 09/03/2001 - 21:10 |
| The Love Letter | 0 | Making a moronic little movie with virtually no story arc is cake when you're married to one of the most powerful men in Hollywood. | 05/21/1999 - 21:14 |
| The Mask of Zorro | 0 | Every time something significant happens in the movie that does not take place during the course of an action scene, some asshole strums a guitar. | 07/17/1998 - 21:13 |