Two Bomb Mr. Cranky Movie Reviews

MovieCommentsBlurbCreatedsort icon
Blue Car0

Suburbia is a really screwed-up place, and I'm glad I don't live there.

05/02/2003 - 19:42
Boiler Room0

This isn't just "Wall Street" for the new millennium -- it pretty much is "Wall Street."

02/18/2000 - 20:49

No need to bone up on a great time. "Bones" is definitely it!

10/24/2001 - 21:08

Since Cohen paints Kazakhstanis as backward, racist, sexist pigs, the film has been condemned as being racist. I didn't know Kazakhstanis were a race, but that's another argument.

11/03/2006 - 21:12

Apparently Don Roos doesn't care that the best his film could possibly be is a media oddity destined to find itself referenced on the front pages of The National Inquirer and Star Magazine.

11/15/2000 - 21:19
Bowling for Columbine0

I'd pick up the phone and yell, "So how do you like them apples, BITCH?"

10/09/2002 - 21:29

(Braveheart contains) the kind of moment that makes preschoolers point to the screen and say, "Christ figure! Christ figure!"

05/24/1995 - 21:41
Bread and Tulips0

I'm not exactly sure what Rosalba was expecting out of life, but I've got news for her: Life is pretty boring.

03/03/2000 - 21:56
Breaking the Waves0

Anybody familiar with Danish director Lars Von Trier knows that his films do for emotional stability what Michael Jackson does for child care.

11/13/1996 - 22:20
Bridget Jones's Diary 0

The films are so similar they've melded together in my mind.

04/13/2001 - 22:28
Bring It On0

I seriously considered ripping my own eyes out, eating them, and jamming popcorn into my ears with the end of my Coke straw until my brain was soaked with Canola oil.

08/25/2000 - 22:36
Bringing Down the House0

Who knew there was a screenwriting class at Bob Jones University?

03/07/2003 - 22:38
Broken Arrow0

I've got news for Woo and all the Hollywood types who are holding his feet to the fire: CHRISTIAN SLATER IS A WEENIE.

02/09/1996 - 22:55

If "Cars" is any evidence, the tread on the Pixar tire is starting to go bald.

06/09/2006 - 17:12
Casino Royale1

As far as I'm concerned, anything is better than the invisible car fiasco of "Die Another Day," a film that crapped all over the Bond series like an incontinent elephant.

11/17/2006 - 17:27
Cast Away0

I'm just a tiny bit sick of this same theme pervading the holiday movies: "Oh, if I just would have appreciated what life had to offer and made a different choice, I could have been a better human being" -- the "It's a Wonderful Life" syndrome. I say screw that.

12/22/2000 - 17:38

There's a small revelation at the beginning of the filmthat Joe has a bad heart. From that point on, the movie is just one big death watch.

09/25/1996 - 18:07
Celtic Pride0

Just because Damon Wayans is black and bald doesn't mean he can play ball. In "Celtic Pride" he barely looks tall enough to dunk an apple in a toilet.

04/19/1996 - 21:13
Changing Lanes0

"Changing Lanes" made me want to change theaters.

04/12/2002 - 21:24
Charlie and the Chocolate Factory 0

Who knew the eccentric candy maker was a cross between Vanna White and Pee Wee Herman? Kids may be disturbed to the point of a post-traumatic disorder.

07/15/2005 - 21:29