Culture War

Grandstanding Media Whores

It seems that most of our politicians these days are no more than grandstanding media whores, who have about as much business being in positions of power as Paris Hilton does competing on Jeopardy.


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Other People's Children

I'm tired of people's children. Sick of them, in fact. It seems that no matter where I go, somebody's kid is screaming his or her head off and pissing me off.


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Oscar Predictions 2005

Let's face it, most of you are complete suckers.


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SpongeBob GayPants and the Fundamentalist Agenda

So apparently, SpongeBob SquarePants is gay. And should be banned. Then arrested. Then burned to a spongy crisp in the everlasting fires of Christian Hell.


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Merry F%@#%@# Christmas

I don't celebrate Christmas. I don't celebrate any holidays in December. None. Zero. Zip. As far as I'm concerned, Christmas is like a cancer. I'm not religious and I don't participate.


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Don't Drink and Vote

There's been a lot of vitriol hurled at both Democrats and Republicans this election, but I'd like to focus on one party that has, until this point, largely escaped some richly deserved criticism.


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Electrocute Martha Stewart

Some would say that Friday, October 8, 2004, was a banner day in the history of American justice, for that was the day that Martha Stewart reported to prison to serve a 5-month term for lying to the F


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The First Presidential Debate

If there were a movie with this many miscues, I'd receive dozens of e-mails demanding I attend and suffer through the entire thing.


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Hurricane Welfare

On Tuesday, September 28, President Bush made his third request for supplemental storm aid to help the victims of the hurricanes that have hit Florida and the surrounding states.


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A Campaign Without Balls

I have but one question for the Democratic National Committee and the John Kerry campaign: Where are your fucking balls?


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