Fuck you winter
Seriously. We're done. This is an abusive fucking relationship, and I don't have to put up with it. Did you know it's summer on half the planet right now? That's right. I've got options. I've got better options than you and I don't have to put up with you any longer. You were kind of cool, at first, but then you weaseled your way into every facet of my life. Then I learned what a frigid bitch you really were. Storms, traffic, road closures, more storms, lost wages, lost power, lost heat, hell, because of you I haven't left my apartment in 5 days. I ran out of food two days ago and have been drinking ever since. I haven't talked to a living human in 4 days. I haven't showered in 3 days and I can't masturbate any more because of the chafing. I'm a broken shell of a human. You've wrecked my life and I want it back.
No more warnings, winter. We're through. The first chance I get, I'm leaving for someplace where water exists as a liquid. Fuck you.