Housekeeper wanted

Elderly gentlemen would like to avail himself of a housekeeper for light duties, including but not limited to shopping, cooking, cleaning, laundry, and miscellaneous other tasks too numerous to mention. Previous experience not required. On the job training provided. An ability to walk about in darkened rooms would be considered an asset.

Apply to Box 13, Nara Visa, Arizona stating why you feel especially eligible.


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Xur's picture

Must cook a mean enchilada.

The appropriate woman

RidingFool's picture

will get the whole enchilada.

Re: Houskeeper needed

RidingFool's picture

This position is for weekends only. No long-term commitments required.

Perks?

Mal_Content's picture

I notice you haven't mentioned perks.

The only perks

RidingFool's picture

will occur when the elderly coffee-pot comes to a boil.

You forgot

Rajah's picture

Must shave elderly gentleman's back

Hope lives!

RidingFool's picture

While I might be one or two years shy of this elderly gentleman's experience, I am truly ecstatic that there might yet be hope. Keep those cards and letters coming!

BEIJING (Reuters) – An 81-year-old Chinese man has proved age need not be a barrier to Internet love, marrying a 58-year-old bride he met online

tinyurl.com/5h5yp8

Now do you see why I need help?

RidingFool's picture

SARGENT, Ga. -- Would-be cleaners take note: A blowtorch is not a good substitute for a broom. Coweta County authorities say Galen Winchell set fire to his west Georgia home Wednesday as he cleaned cobwebs from exterior eaves with a blowtorch.

I see his mistake

Rajah's picture

I always use dynamite for cobwebs!

One more reason why I should have help:

RidingFool's picture

Cleanup is a bitch, so to speak.

90-year-old living with 3 siblings' bodies

EVANSTON, Illinois : Police in a Chicago suburb say a 90-year-old apparently has been living in a house with the bodies of three siblings - one of whom may have been dead since the early 1980s.

 

Hmmm

Rajah's picture

And all this time I thought it was because grandma was shy!

<pokes grandma with a stick>

Good help is so hard to get

RidingFool's picture

Tigers kill Singapore zoo cleaner

A cleaner at Singapore Zoo has died after being mauled by three tigers. Zookeepers raised the alarm after they heard the screams of horrified visitors.

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