Is it the intent of Cranky management to let this site die?

1.  No reviews for Avitar?  No review for Sherlock Holmes?  No Blind Side review?  No Alvin and the Chipmunks The Squeakquel review?  No review of Up in the Air? (Here's my short review:  It sucked buttermilk through a coffee stirring stick.  It lacked a plot and was just a look at a slice of life of an asshole who didn't have much of one, and that I could care less about.  4 Bombs.)

Cranky Reviews bring new eyes to this site, and tend to keep the eyes here once lured in.  If there are no new reviews, no new people will come, and your existing eye base will tend to look elsewhere. 

What happened to you and your writing crew? 


2.  Your Oscar Poll has been up since last April.  Please take it down or at least remove it from the Home page.  Does anything scream "Dead Site" louder than an obviously unatttended outdated topic featured on the home page?  

Also, the caption contest has been up since September.  Can't you just pick a winner (Nickumoh?  Scumby?) and move this to the finished caption contests section?  Is it that much trouble to put up a new one?  BTW, that was an excellent choice for a caption contest.  I have no idea why it didn't inspire some truly brilliant captions.  I would have tried harder, but damn, it turns out I'm not truly brilliant after all.  Again, leaving a contest up this long after the entries have quit coming in just screams "Dead site."  


3.  I rather enjoy killing Spams, and I've got a suggestion for you in that area.  Being rather busy, I only get a chance to visit this site about three to five times per day.  Lately, it seems to me as if I've been removing about 10-30 spams per day and many are from serial spammers.  I have no idea how  many Spams my cohort in Miami is killing, but I'll wager it's as many if not more than I kill.  I seem to see the same spammer handles over and over again.  I use the "Report Spam" button you've so kindly provided.  Could you add an automatic function to delete the accounts of users whose spams I've deleted?  Also, could you change your current human user verification technique from the simple math problem to Captcha?  If you look at the Captcha scheme Craigslist uses, for instance, the characters are so obscured that takes some real work to get correct.  Let's start killing handles and making these dirtbags work for it if they want to spam your site.  

Do you have any idea why these Chinese shitheads want to kill this site? Did you demean the Chinese government?  If not, why not?  They're repressive totalitarian schmucks. 



I don't agree with Mr. Cranky that a site pointing out why movies sucked is no longer relevant.  There is a place for movie Crankiness, and with a bit more effort, this place could once again be it.  I believe if you make the changes I've suggested and perhaps include a few innovations of your own, this place can once again thrive and have many more people participating than just the four or five regulars you have now.

Thanks for your consideration. 


Did you like this post? Vote Up or Down.

I killed five more Spams this morning.

Coaster's picture

Please yank the following handles:  pickb2b2, Kal_El, and ttivy. 

Google accuses China of Cyber-attacks

Dan_in_Cincinnati's picture

From the NY Times:

SANTA CLARA, Calif. — Last month, when Google engineers at their sprawling campus in Silicon Valley began to suspect that Chinese intruders were breaking into private Gmail accounts, the company began a secret counteroffensive.

It managed to gain access to a computer in Taiwan that it suspected of being the source of the attacks. Peering inside that machine, company engineers actually saw evidence of the aftermath of the attacks, not only at Google, but also at at least 33 other companies, including Adobe Systems, Northrop Grumman and Juniper Networks, according to a government consultant who has spoken with the investigators.

Seeing the breadth of the problem, they alerted American intelligence and law enforcement officials and worked with them to assemble powerful evidence that the masterminds of the attacks were not in Taiwan, but on the Chinese mainland.

Computer experts who track the thousands of daily attacks on corporate and government computer sites report that the majority of sophisticated attacks seem to emanate from China. What they cannot say is whether the hackers are operating on behalf of the Chinese state or in a haven that the Chinese have encouraged.

“Everything we are learning is that in this case the Chinese government got caught with its hand in the cookie jar,” said James A. Lewis, a senior fellow at the Center for Strategic and International Studies in Washington, who consulted for the White House on cybersecurity last spring. “Would it hold up in court? No. But China is the only government in the world obsessed about Tibet, and that issue goes right to the heart of their vision of political survival and putting down the separatists’ movements.”

Over the years, there have been private warnings issued to China, notably after an attack on the computer systems used by the office of the defense secretary two years ago. A senior military official said in December that that attack “raised a lot of alarm bells,” but the attacker could not be pinpointed. The administration cautioned Chinese officials that attacks seemingly aimed at the national security leadership would not be tolerated, according to one American who took part in delivering that message.

{;-) Dan in Miami

PS:  So Crankyland is on the same exalted level of Google and the US Department of Defense.


Why won't it hold up in court?

TMundo's picture

at least get the hackers, don't publish an article about it until you get them first.

If the Chinese government doesn't cooperate it's hard to prove

Dan_in_Cincinnati's picture

Google is certain that the attacks are coming from China.  China is a huge country with over 1 billion people.  If the Chinese government is responsible they are unlikely to cooperate.  Without that cooperation how do you find the actual culprits?

This is another example of the lawlessness of China.  Chinese products are crap because they can get away with it.  Chinese steal movies and music because they can get away with it.  China does not respect international law or international agreements.  Just try and sue for any of the above in Chinese courts and see how far you get.

And yes I know that post is spam.  Just another example of how the Chinese have no respect for anything but making money.  They can't even seem to understand basic property rights.  If these ass hats want to advertise here then they should pay for it.

{;-) Dan in Miami




The Chinese Cyber threat and you

Dan_in_Cincinnati's picture

From the Washington Post animated cartoonist Ann Telnaes and kind of cute:

{;-) Dan in Miami

Yahoo accuses China of cyber attacks, 40 minutes ago

Dan_in_Cincinnati's picture


Filed at 7:56 a.m. ET, January 16, 2010

SHANGHAI (Reuters) -

Yahoo said Wednesday it stood aligned with Google's position that attacks on company networks are deeply disturbing and that violation of Internet user privacy is something that must be opposed.

Yahoo knew it had been a target of sophisticated Chinese cyber attacks on U.S. firms before Google alerted the company to them, but remained silent while its bigger rival went public, a source familiar with the situation told Reuters.

{;-) Dan in Miami

PS:  My prediction is that dozens of companies will eventually accuse China of cyber-attacks.

German government says don't use Microsoft browser

Dan_in_Cincinnati's picture

Germany issues Explorer warning

By Daniel Emery

Technology Reporter, BBC News

The German government has warned web users to find an alternative browser to Internet Explorer to protect security.

The warning from the Federal Office for Information Security comes after Microsoft admitted IE was the weak link in recent attacks on Google's systems.

Microsoft rejected the warning, saying that the risk to users was low and that the browsers' increased security setting would prevent any serious risk.

However, German authorities say that even this would not make IE fully safe.

{;-) Dan in Miami

PS:  Oh how the mighty have fallen!

Obama again does the opposite of what he says

Dan_in_Cincinnati's picture

From Faux News:

[Director of National Intelligence Dennis] Blair warned as well of a growing cyber threat, saying computer-related attacks have become dynamic and malicious.

Obama has promised to make cyber security a priority in his administration, but the president's new budget asks for a decrease in funds for the Homeland Security Department's cybersecurity division.

The government's first quadrennial homeland security review states high consequence and large-scale cyberattacks could massively disable or hurt international financial, commercial and physical infrastructure.

The report, obtained by The Associated Press, said these types of cyberattacks could cripple the movement of people and goods around the world and bring vital social and economic programs to a halt.

{;-) Dan in Miami

PS:  Does Obama actually know what's in his budget?

Feds may spend $40 billion on cyber security

Dan_in_Cincinnati's picture

From the NY Times: By JOHN MARKOFF

Published: March 1, 2010

The Obama administration on Tuesday plans to declassify portions of the Comprehensive National Cybersecurity Initiative, created during the Bush administration as a secret effort to harness the nation’s defensive and offensive strategies for protecting commercial and government networks.

The cybersecurity initiative emerged from a classified National Security Presidential Directive signed by President George W. Bush in January 2008. The initiative was intended to unify the efforts of various government agencies as well as to develop security programs to protect the nation’s computer networks. Although the budget for the program has been secret, independent estimates have suggested that it may cost as much as $40 billion over the next five years.

{;-) Dan in Miami

I've been learning ancient Greek

FearlessFreep's picture

And I just learned that the English word "cybernetics" comes from the Greek word for "helmsman."

I'll bet you NEEDED to know that!

























Ancient Greek?

Coaster's picture

What are you going to do with that?  Go to Greece and talk to old people?

My wife and I hope to get to Greece in the Summer of 2011. I think I will bone up on Greek culture prior. I'll start with "entrenched corruption" first.

I was riding around some strange place with a young lady

RidingFool's picture

on my back. We happened to go by a place with the following sign on the wall by the entrance, no lie!

Greek Social Club - Entrance at Rear

We laughed to hard I damn near rode it into the curb.

Hmmm, heard there's 7 differnt types of love...

TMundo's picture






Well that's 5 of em according to the wiki

When you think about it, english does use the word 'love' too carelessly.  One might have a better understanding of what love is if one had better words for more complex situations.


Isn't there also love as a game?

FearlessFreep's picture

BTW, the reason my post above has a big blank space is because my elbow pressed against the Enter key on the calculator pad section of my keyboard.


TMundo's love definitions of romantic nature

TMundo's picture

So there's that fuirst love you feel when you start dating a person you relly like.  That's the love of attraction.  THe person is good looking with a great personality, omg, I'm in love!  But you don't know the person from adam, you don't even know what their favorite color is.  That's the Love of Attraction.

Then there's the love of rejection, when you get dumped.  This hurts, but again, you may have not be all that turned on by the person prior to them dumping you, but all of a sudden, you're lovesick, this is the love of rejection.

Then there's the Real Love, this kinf of love takes time, you must get to know everything about the person, and the relationship fits together like complex jigsaw pieces, although sometimes you gottah cut a few tabs and sand a few edges to make things fit, but when they do, the real love shows itself, not to mention, if the love of attraction hasn't worn off yet, you could get a nice combo goin on.

Well that's my opinion, but due to lack of experience, I'm talking out my ass.

Then there's the love a parent has for their child, and vice versa, and family members, and friends that love each other.

And there's loving to do stuff, like hobbies & sports.

And of course the love God has for man, that he would save us, and man has for God.

In english, we use the same word "love" for all of these things and it makes love hard to define or understand.

Again, I'm no expert, feel free to elaborate.

Nicely stated, TMundo...

HS's picture least the first three paragraphs, of which I agree almost entirely. 

Speaking of which, one thing I learned from my numerous failed relationships is to be *extremely careful* when using the word "love" around your partner.  She could have a different idea, i.e. that you're ready to marry her, whatever.  If you aren't as sure as she is, don't fucking say it.



Substitute the word "love"...

Mal_Content's picture

for lust and dependence in the first two paragraphs.  I've already forgotten the content of the third...oh, yeah, something about mature love, I think.  Companionship with a large helping of lust.  If only we could hold that moment forever...sigh.

And, HS, some women will run away screaming if you even mention the word marriage.

Crankyland is now basically a Basement Forum

Rajah's picture

No reason to hide anymore cause there's nobody here.

Ah, I've missed you guys...

Smush's picture

Wow, the place has really changed.  It'll take some getting used to.

-poster formerly known as Irving P. Thorne III


Wulfgar's picture

For reals? Omigod!




~There ain't no Devil, just God when He's drunk.~


Something wrong on the Leaderboard charts here...

TMundo's picture

There are some names I don't recognise, I'm not even sure they post here, unless they are spammers.  Their names should be deleted.

They are indeed Spammers.

Coaster's picture

Currently, positions 2-5, and 9 are held by Spam handles.  They are likely all used by the same worthless shithead in an attempt to raise the Google profile of his cheap shit Chinese merchandise scam sites. 

But have no fear: The Spaminator watches over you. 

Jeez. Sorry I left.

TheWreck's picture

If my departure drove Cranky to hit the bottle full-time and the movies no-time, then I render my most heart-felt apologies and promise to start coming back more regularly.

I might even start seeing some movies again so that I can pretend that's what I'm here for.



So totally your fault, dood.

Coaster's picture


I can't count how many times people have said in their final posts, "If The Wreck ain't gonna post, I'm outta here." 

And we miss them all, even if they can't spell worth shit.

Welcome back. 

W - o - r - t - h - - S - h - i - t

TheWreck's picture

*I* can spell "worth shit"!

The proud result of a Cat'lick education.

It looks like *you're* running the place now.

What happened - Bruce Willis put a cap in Cranky's ass?


Cranky is semi-retired

Coaster's picture

He's got a house in the woods, a wife, a child, all that domestic stuff.  He's got a full-time job.  Mr. Cranky was always a mega-hobby for him.  If you'll check the reviews and his blog, you'll see he still contributes every so often.  He is located further from the city than he was during the zenith of Cranky, and that makes it much harder for him to get out to see a good movie, let along half the shit he saw, though he claims every movie he's ever watched satisfied him on some level.

Jazzdrive took over the site from Mr. Cranky and Bjorn.  What you see here is his handiwork.   I, for one, and grateful, though I wish he would publish more reviews. 

Coaster, let me know if you want to collaborate again

Dan_in_Cincinnati's picture


And I don't mean anything kinky.  I really enjoyed writing the Up review with you. 

{;-) Dan in Miami



Sure thing. That was fun.

Coaster's picture

All the more interesting because we seldom like the same kind of movies.

Mr. Coaster & Dan

TMundo's picture

I certainly would also like to contribute, THe way I see it, Jazz is far too busy to publish reviews, he is a webmaster and benefactor but that is it, the way I see it, any sort of promotion, review, and spamminating must come from us, the core members. We can only sit here and talk to ourselves for so long.

Promotion -- That comes when reviews are up on a weekly basis.

Reviews -- They are what bring new blood to the site and encourage new posters.  We, the original members and hardcore devotees to the site, must now take up the resposibility of running and maintaining it.  "We," are the new Crankyland.  What? Did you think it was going to run by itself?  Jazz said he wanted a core team of writers and We are it.  So here's the deal-ee'Oh.  A few of us have cushy jobs and time on our hands, (looks at coaster and coughs) and can afford to see the films featured in theaters. A few of us don't, but enjoy renting flicks in our spare time and since the new released dvd rentals have already been covered by previous film reviews (much like the old site) I propose dvd rental reviews for films that are off the beaten path, whether they be independent or cult (coughs to self) for instance, I just saw wings of desire by wim wenders which scored itself best director years ago at the cannes festival for which the hollywood film city of angels was based upon.  And I would just love to write a scathing review of this film.  There's so nmuch to praise thropugh satire and more to bash.  Anyway, that being said, I think we could do well with the site with a little more connectivity and communication between the hardcore members.

and that is what I propose...

Coaster, you know where top reach me, anyone else can reach me at, which is my alternate spam E-Mail address, so spammers do your worst, it'll never get read.

Cranky's WORKING!?!

TheWreck's picture

Wow!  Sweet buttered Christ on whole wheat toast with mango chutney!  That explains all of the Real Wrath of God stuff that's been happening lately.

But he should have left Haiti alone.  Life sucked there badly enough already.  Unless he was aiming for Aruba and missed.


Coaster along with Dan from Miami/Cincinnaty have been given ...

Rajah's picture

the power to delete chinese spammers

They're drunk with power!

Crankyland needs Women!

Rajah's picture

We could go to the more active sites and lure them with candy

Comment viewing options

Select your preferred way to display the comments and click "Save settings" to activate your changes.