Ridiculous but real movie titles (non-porn)

From theonion.com:

1. The Amazing Dr. Clitterhouse (1938)

2. “Billion Dollar Boner” (1960)

3. “Don’t Get Gay With Your Manicure!” (1903)

4. The Bank Dick (1940)

5. “Pussy Willie” (1929)

6. “The Boob Detective” (1914)

7. Three Nuts For Cinderella (1973)

8. “On The Knocker” (1963)

9. Dandy Dick (1935)

10. “Oh, What A Boob!” (1913)

For the rest of the list please go to:

http://www.avclub.com/articles/the-amazing-dr-what-26-real-titles-from-o...

{;-) Dan in Miami


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THE BANK DICK is a classic

FearlessFreep's picture

WC Fields at his best.

 

Some BANK DICK quotes

FearlessFreep's picture

Boy in bank: Mommy, doesn't that man have a funny nose? 
Mother in bank: You mustn't make fun of the gentleman, Clifford. You'd like to have a nose like that full of nickels, wouldn't you? 
Myrtle Sousé: I'll starve myself to death, it's the easiest way out. It's not so difficult to do. I tried it yesterday afternoon. 
Egbert Sousé: Og Oggilby... sounds like a bubble in a bathtub! 
Egbert Sousé: Was I in here last night and did I spend a twenty dollar bill? 
Joe Guelpe: Yeah. 
Egbert Sousé: Oh boy, what a load that is off my mind! I thought I'd lost it. 
Elsie Mae Adele Brunch Sousé: Shall I bounce a rock off his head? 
Agatha Sousé: Respect your father, darling. What kind of a rock? 
J. Frothingham Waterbury: Gosh!... Oh, pardon my language. 
Egbert Sousé: That's okay. I swear sometimes myself. 
Egbert Sousé: My uncle, a balloon ascensionist, Effingham Hoofnagle, took a chance. He was three miles and a half up in the air. He jumped out of the basket of the balloon and took a chance of alighting on a load of hay. 
Og Oggilby: Golly! Did he make it? 
Egbert Sousé: Uh... no. He didn't. Had he been a younger man, he probably would have made it. That's the point. Don't wait too long in life. 
Egbert Sousé: Don't be a luddy-duddy! Don't be a mooncalf! Don't be a jabbernowl! You're not those, are you? 
Myrtle Sousé: I'll bet that's Og! 
Mrs. Hermisillo Brunch: Mmm, he's got her bettin' now. She never gambled 'fore she met him. 
Egbert Sousé: I'm very fond of children. Girl children, around eighteen and twenty. 
Elsie Mae Adele Brunch Sousé: What's the matter, Pop? Don't you love me? 
Egbert Sousé: [raising his hand in anger] Certainly I love you! 
Agatha Sousé: Don't you dare strike that child! 
Egbert Sousé: She's not gonna tell ME I don't love her. 
Myrtle Sousé: [doing a crossword puzzle] What's a six-letter word meaning "embezzlement"? 
Mrs. Hermisillo Brunch: Prison. 
Og Oggilby: Oh... I knew this would happen! I was a perfect idiot to ever listen to you! 
Egbert Sousé: You listen to me, Og! There's nothing in this world that is perfect. 
Egbert Sousé: The jockey was a very insulting fellow. He referred to my proboscis as an adscititious excrescence. I had to tweak his nose. 
Egbert Sousé: Ten cents a share. Telephone sold for five cents a share. How would you like something better for ten cents a share? If five gets ya ten, ten'll get ya twenty. A beautiful home in the country, upstairs and down. Beer flowing through the estate over your grandmother's paisley shawl. 
Og Oggilby: Beer? 
Egbert Sousé: Beer! Fishing in the stream that runs under the aboreal dell. A man comes up from the bar, dumps $3,500 in your lap for every nickel invested. Says to you, "Sign here on the dotted line." And then disappears in the waving fields of alfalfa. 
Egbert Sousé: [to bank robber, after narrowly missing the police during a car chase] Seems to be a great deal of traffic here for a country road. Don't you think? 
Egbert Sousé: Is that gun loaded? 
Mother in bank: Certainly not! But I think you are! 
Egbert Sousé: Did you warble my little wren? 
J. Frothingham Waterbury: I want to show you I'm honest in the worst way! 
J. Pinkerton Snoopington: Can't we, eh, pull the shade? 
Egbert Sousé: You can pull anything you want in here. It's a regular joint. 

 

 

W.C. Fields : The Dentist

Rajah's picture

did they have censors back then?

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=DumJ2SAjtlM

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