Against the Ropes

Bomb Rating: 

Here's one of my rules for hating movies: If the story's catharsis involves people applauding the protagonist, that film sucks.

Omar Epps and Meg Ryan in Against the Ropes

Here's one of my rules for hating movies: If the story's catharsis involves people applauding the protagonist, that film sucks. This action is even more insidious if the applause is initiated by one character and the clapping spreads to other characters like a virus, finally landing on the film's antagonist, who just can't help himself and claps too. This scenario is the work of the cinema Devil.

The applause here is for boxing manager Jackie Kallen (Meg Ryan), who helps Luther Shaw (Omar Epps) win the Middleweight title. Because Jackie is such a publicity hound, Luther has changed managers and turned to the evil Larocca (Tony Shalhoub). Though Larocca hates Jackie with every fiber of his being, he's standing there clapping at the end because, well, she's just so spunky.

For a film that's supposed to be about boxing, it tells us less about the sport than "Welcome to Mooseport," which isn't even about boxing. Jackie has grown up around the sport, yet there's no instance where she conveys that. Her contribution to Luther's victory involves a ridiculous walk through the middle of the ring during his championship fight in which she tells him he's "got what it takes" or whatever, then tells him to box right-handed. That is the most complex boxing-related interaction in the entire film. Apparently Luther has neither a good trainer nor a functioning brain.

"Against the Ropes" is a low blow, but I'd run into the street singing love ballads if pain in my groin was the only bad thing I felt after seeing this mess.

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Hey

Mr.Cranky's picture

Great review!

and yes

Mr.Cranky's picture

I agree again!

I agree

jazzdrive3's picture

Who would have thought!

Possibly Mr. Cranky, but maybe I'll just say meh instead

TMundo's picture

Meh. instead.

I'll just say

Xur's picture

it's a little weird having these in reverse chronological order. I suppose I'll get used to it in time, though...

another test comment

Mr.Cranky's picture

Thanks again for your support and admiration!

I guess this will be the main forum, interesting...

TMundo's picture

this will take some getting used to, first thing I notice is that there doesn't seem to be a main forum, but I assume that will come as soon as new reviews are written.

Also, the forum under the review is slightly different, each post being wider than the old cranky page, it'takes a little longer to scroll through user topics, I suppose I'll get used to it.

Third, what's to stop trolls from adding multipul acccounts and then using them to vote down people they don't like multipul times. Is there a way for you to see who voted down who? I see what happened to the old forum in the past few days and I'm wondering if the thumbs up/thumbs down will effectively deter someone who is bent on destroying the site.

It won't accept multiple votes from the same IP address

Mr.Cranky's picture

So yes, there is a deterrent.

Not bad.

michael3b's picture

I kinda liked the way the meat of the message was invisible at MC 1.0.

Congrats either way on pulling this off. Talk about Victory, Jaws, and De Feet...

Looks OK so far.

Wulfgar's picture

Oboy, bold and italics!

 

 

 

Ok, this is pretty awesome.

MadNessMonster's picture

FIIIISH!

Holy shit, I just posted a picture... maybe (everybody can see the fish right?)  The mind boggles.

I can't see the fish, but I don't kno where it's supposed to be

TMundo's picture

I'm sure at some point we'll figure that part out.

Sorry, I had a sudden

daz's picture

Sorry, I had a sudden hankering for sushi.

Apparently the picture posting thingie doesn't want to work.

MadNessMonster's picture

Ah well. Not a life-or-death situation.

Signature test.

A ghost of a fish just told

daz's picture

A ghost of a fish just told me otherwise.

Damn, I really need to lay off the coffee.

Oh, now the fish is thwer and my first post looks stupid.

TMundo's picture

...now there's a situation where the edit function would come in hand, but it's not uimportqant enough.

Ooh, pretty!

MadNessMonster's picture

So I guess the question of great societal fallout now is this: How do we prevent the inevitable trolls from showing off their gore-porn collections?

I know we're not into censorship here, but you have to draw the line somewhere. Some of us have kids, sme of us have concerned parents, and probably most of us post from computers that are right in our living rooms, you know.

In the dark of night is when I do all of my posting.

RidingFool's picture

No one sees my computer screen!

This is cool

Critico's picture

like it so far.

I just watched Lost in Translation, not sure what to feel

TMundo's picture

I got the hole 'lost' thing, that was pretty obvious right away.

Spoilers
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I guess I was waiting and waiting for him and the girl to get together in a bridges of madison county sort of way, and then when he goes the other way it put me off a bit, kinda ruined their chemistry and didn't really take the time to set it back on track which left me disallusioned. So I guess it was like anadulterous move to a friendship that almost became an adulterous move to both of their spouses but in the end he still committed adultery, just with someone else. I was glad the plot didn't follow the traditional romance movie guidlines, but I was still put off by it and wonder if there was something else Sofia could have put into the story instead of the jazz singer. Maybe that was all she could think of, I mean what else could be put in.

The cinematography was on point. Not overly, "Hey! Look at me, I'm good at cinematography!" restrained enough but perfect and balanced.

Wow that post is so big?

TMundo's picture

What happens when grundle, oh forget it...

I knew what to feel...

michael3b's picture

...disgust. That movie was tripe. Only a step above The Virgin Suicides, which is the most pretentious movie in history. Sophia Coppola = Suck.

Yeah-

michael3b's picture

"Open" comments will clutter up the place right quick. Like I said somewhere else, it'd be nice to have closed comments that can be viewed en masse ala MC 1.0.

At the bottom of the forum you can collapse the thread

TMundo's picture

yay

Wee!

MadNessMonster's picture

(Plays with the new options. Decides she rather likes the default ones.)

Well that looks a lot better.

michael3b's picture

No further complaints...

This woman has had so much plastic surgery on her face and

RidingFool's picture

collagen injections on her lips that she's unrecognizable as the same person from the "you've got mail" phenomenon. Unfortunately, she didn't do her tits.

I'm such happy to make virtual appearence of digital nature

The_Russian's picture

I'm give salutations and welcomes all new users to recently created site.

Oops.

Wulfgar's picture

I negged somebody.

Sorry, dude.

No worries...

Xur's picture

I canceled out your neg.

Hoorey!

Wulfgar's picture

Release the pigeons!

Ugh.

By the way...

MadNessMonster's picture

"Ugh." ???

Methinks we need to add Some Way To Differentiate Our Signatures From the Body Text of our Posts to The List.

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