10/16/1998: Kids can't read

Posted By: Eraser_Ed


And why should they be able to? We've got fashion and entertainment industries to teach them how to communicate and find belonging through jeans that are so hard they dent an iron ball. Isn't it fantastic? By the way, do you have any of those hard jeans yet? I can't wait to get some. I never wanted jeans that were uncomfortably hard, but ever since I've seen these great Levi's commercials, I realize how much I must have been missing out on.

As long as we make crappy, cheesey movies that commercialize and joke about the survival of the human race, why not also put blue jeans on a pedestal above God, fate, and the mysteries of life? If there's one thing you've got to say for Hollywood and its close, mutually parasitic friend, Advertising, it's that they certainly must be congratulated on the very inspiring and spiritually progressive things they force feed kids, and other humans too stupid to realize the big breasts and explosions on the screen are nothing more than distractions for H & A to inconspicuously slip consumers' wallets out of their pockets.

You're welcome.


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