Anything Else

Bomb Rating: 

This is the same old, tired crap that Woody Allen has been exporting for who knows how many years now. It's like drinking milk with an expiration date from the Reagan era.

The obvious selling point of this Woody Allen film is that there are actually younger people in it, but sadly, Jason Biggs has essentially assumed Woody Allen's normal role as the insecure guy entrenched in a freakishly confusing relationship. To make matters worse, Allen is also in the film as a slightly aggressive writer, which means that we get two -- count 'em: two -- Woody Allens for the price of one. Really, it's the kind of bargain that makes you want to jam your coupon-clipping scissors right through your eyeball.

This isn't a movie so much as a parable about how not to be a man. Jerry Falk (Biggs) has smaller testicles than a field mouse. He's incapable of making a decisions, so when he gets into a relationship with the nutty Amanda (Christina Ricci), it's like watching the emergence of some grotesque anthropological creature we shall call NeuterMan.

Jerry lets Amanda walk all over him. They haven't slept together for six months, yet Jerry continues to accept Amanda's explanation that she's having some kind of crisis. He even lets Amanda's mother (Stockard Channing) move in with them. He can't say no. He can't say stop. When Jerry's friend, David (Allen) points out that Amanda might be cheating on him, this comes as a surprise to Jerry. Unfortunately for neuroses-avoiders, Jerry also sees a therapist who won't talk to him and has an agent, Harvey (Danny DeVito), who claims the mediocre Jerry as his only client. Every relationship in Jerry's life is problematic.

We're all used to hearing Woody Allen speak dialogue that Woody Allen writes, but when it comes out of the mouths of other actors, it doesn't even sound real. It sounds like bad actors doing a rehearsal for a Woody Allen play. Ultimately, this is the same old, tired crap that Woody Allen has been exporting for who knows how many years now. It's like drinking milk with an expiration date from the Reagan era.