A Smile Like Yours

Bomb Rating: 

Infertility is sometimes God's way of saying "please refrain from breeding."

Movies this bad usually offer a sole challenge to the audience: figuring out how the thing ever got made in the first place. Not with this one. Director and co-screenwriter Keith Samples is the founder and former CEO of Rysher Entertainment, the company that produced the movie. All he had to do was bend over and stick his finger up his own ass.

With all the creativity and originality of a lump of tar, Samples has gone out and made an insufferable film about a couple trying to have a baby. Since the word "insufferable" and Greg Kinnear go hand-in-hand, he stars as the husband, Danny Robertson. He and his wife, Jennifer (Lauren Holly), have a great sex life but can't seem to get pregnant. Perplexed, Jennifer gives Danny a blow job and takes the collected sperm to a doctor who informs her that Danny has a fertility problem.

"A Smile Like Yours" is about what one would expect from a former film company CEO. It probably looked great to the studio's sniveling toadies, but for the rest of us, it harbors all the subtlety of a cesarean section. Little kids run up to Jennifer and say "all the kids love your cookies, Mrs. Robertson" instead of "you'd make a great mom, Mrs. Robertson, if only your damn husband weren't infertile."

To spice things up, Samples mixes recurring masturbation jokes with uncomfortable, needless scenes of Holly having her parts prodded in her noble quest to grunt out human being number five-billion-and-one. God forbid it should ever dawn on them to adopt. After all, in the case of people like Samples, Kinnear and Holly, infertility is sometimes God's way of saying "please refrain from breeding."

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