bleah





Balls of Fury


Mr. Cranky's rating:
3 Bombs


It's funny in the same way that the later skits on "Saturday Night Live" are funny. You know, the ones that are usually on after most normal people have turned off the television because they realize that the really funny stuff came early and now the show is just biding its time to get to the end.



Seems like every dumb ass comedian who wants to do some kind of ridiculous spoof parodies Jean-Claude Van Damme's "Bloodsport." Now, I use "Bloodsport" as my reference because that's simply the movie I best remember, as I was all of five years old when "Enter the Dragon" came out.

Both movies involved some martial artist entering some underground martial arts tournament. However, I must insist that "Bloodsport" is the target of this parody since it features the stupid-looking white guy invading the Asian world.

In "Balls of Fury," Randy Daytona (Dan Fogler) heads to the Orient to compete in a ping pong tournament held by Feng (Christopher Walken). Randy is a former child prodigy who has never lived down an embarrassment at the 1988 Olympics at the hands of Karl Wolfschtagg (Thomas Lennon).

"Balls of Fury" will probably best be remembered for being a movie "brought to you by those guys who made Reno 911." It's funny in the same way that the later skits on "Saturday Night Live" are funny. You know, the ones that are usually on after most normal people have turned off the television because they realize that the really funny stuff came early and now the show is just biding its time to get to the end.

Quite frankly, "Balls of Fury" has some reasonably comical moments, but they're interspersed with long, monotonous periods where the actors do one of two things: recite plot detail or look bored. Christopher Walken and character actor James Hong (best-known from "Big Trouble in Little China"), both senior citizens, have apparently been instructed by director Ben Garant to ham it up. Hong is the blind ping pong master who helps Randy rediscover his talent. Walken's Feng is the former student who has turned evil.

Unfortunately, the movie rides on the back of Fogler, who's a cross between Jack Black and Seth Rogen and who always seems caught trying to decide whether to join Walken and Hong in a ham session or to play it straight. It's an uncomfortable place, kind of like when a joke played on a friend turns into a horrible accident, which when you think about it, is an apt summation of the feeling you'll get as you sit through "Balls of Fury."

Was it really that bad?
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