Barbershop

Bomb Rating: 

If Lawrence Kasdan were black, this is the kind of film he'd make.

If Lawrence Kasdan were black, this is the kind of film he'd make. Now, mind you, I can't stand Lawrence Kasdan films, particularly "Grand Canyon", because the movie consists of nothing more than a bunch of blowhards who sit around and listen to themselves talk. This is pretty much the same formula for "Barbershop," though the pace is increased by virtue of the fact that the blowhards cut hair while they listen to themselves blabber.

Beyond that, not much happens. There are a couple of minor subplots involving JD (Anthony Anderson) and Billy (Lahmard Tate), who steal an ATM machine, and Lester (Keith David), who wants to buy Calvin's (Ice Cube) barbershop and turn it into a gentlemen's club. Working in the barbershop, which seems to have an awful lot of barbers for the few customers they have, are Eddie (Cedric the Entertainer), Terri (Eve), college-educated Jimmy (Sean Patrick Thomas), black-wannabe Isaac (Troy Garity), Dinka (Leonard Howze), and two-strike Ricky (Michael Ealy), whose truck was involved in the ATM theft, meaning he could go to prison for life.

The irony with the ATM machine is that there's no money in it. Now look at the symbolism here: These dumbasses are trying to break into something for money that isn't there. Meanwhile, Calvin considers cashing out by selling his shop, but then changes his mind. See, money isn't everything. Do you get it? If this isn't a message planted by white capitalists to keep the black man down, I don't know what is. I'm sure Dennis Koslowski was telling all his black Tyco employees this very thing: Don't stress about your salary. Enjoy life! Money isn't everything. Incidentally, I hope Bubba in the federal penitentiary will make sure Dennis lives that message every day.

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