Baseketball

Bomb Rating: 

If an utter lack of effort had its own award show, the people involved with "Baseketball" could stand proudly next to the Yugo engineers and Monica Lewinsky's personal trainer as deserving nominees.

Little did David ("Airplane") Zucker know that when he hired TreyParker and Matt Stone to be in his film he was going to end up being the ringmaster in the retarded flea circus. Shortly thereafter, Parker and Stone's "South Park" became bigger than Jesus. One can pretty much assume that Universal then went to Zucker and said something to the effect of, "If these boys say jump, you say: 'how high.' If they say drive a nail through your penis, you ask, 'with or without anesthetic?'"

Baseketball is a combination of basketball and baseball invented by Joe Cooper (Parker) and Doug Remer (Stone) for guys who lack athletic ability. You shoot the ball. If it goes in, you advance around the bases. If it misses, you're out. There's a shot that earns you a single, a double, etc. I won't explain any more than that or I'm going to make myself sick.

If an utter lack of effort had its own award show, the people involved with "Baseketball" could stand proudly next to the Yugo engineers and Monica Lewinsky's personal trainer as deserving nominees. Would you believe four people are credited with writing this script? Those must have been the four people who stood on set all week telling Trey and Matt to say the word "dude" again. Or maybe they teamed up over beers to try to pass their ideas through the hand of a chimp via comic telepathy.

Dude, it was like comical, dude, how those two dudes played that game with those other dudes, dude, and then one of them got to kiss Yasmine Bleeth and the other got to kiss Jenny McCarthy. Dude? Dude. Dude, read this last paragraph over and over again for like an hour-and-a-half straight, dude, and you'll feel exactly like you do at the end of this movie -- like the next person you hear say the word "dude" might have to get dragged by his nostril hair through the nearest busy intersection, dude.

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