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I hate, hate, hate this but I have ALWAYS been the teacher's pet - from when I first started school to now - my senior year in college. Always the one to "watch the room" when the teacher left. Always held up as a little perfect "example" by the teacher. Even last semester, after giving a presentation, my prof said to me "Now, that's how I want everyone's to be." I always set the standard. I always set the curve and had other kids hate me as a result.
I just gave a presentation today. Everyone has to "evaluate" their presentations on this little sheet, and I asked for my sheet, and she said, "Oh, you don't need one. This is only for the others, who are a little more inexperienced."
In elementary school, my teachers sat me apart from the class - literally physically apart in my own corner - and gave me "special" work - harder stuff. It has contributed to an overwhelming sense of isolation and being "different" that has stayed with me to this day.
Just once I wanted to be the one that got up and did a funny dance or something at the front of the class when the teacher's back was turned. The one who had to stay after school and wash the chalkboard.
But I never was. My second grade teacher STILL remembers me and tells me that I was her best student.
It's simultaneously flattering and sickening.
It's funny, I espouse all these revolutionary, avante-garde theories and shit, and still I'm the sweet little girl who gets all A's and smiles too much. Little Miss Perfect. Ugh.
Just venting/sharing/complaining
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