Are they or aren't they? Certainly that is the question everybody wants to know regarding the relationship between Ben Affleck and Gwenyth Paltrow. Are they or aren't they sleeping together? Are they or aren't they waking up to the smell of each other's putrid morning breath? Are they or aren't they watching each other take a big, grunting dump in the toilet each morning? Are they or aren't they paying midgets to perform bizarre sex acts with domesticated animals?
Given all these questions, I think we can all see numerous reasons one would not want to pair these two in a film together, lest the audience begin chattering away about "secret looks" they noticed during key scenes and whether or not one could spot tongue during a tender kissing sequence. Apparently Don ("The Opposite Sex") Roos doesn't care that the best his film could possibly be is a media oddity destined to find itself referenced on the front pages of The National Enquirer and Star Magazine.
The story here is that selfish advertising executive Buddy Amaral (Affleck) gives his plane ticket to Greg so he can have a one-nighter with Mimi (Natasha Henstridge) in the airport hotel. Unfortunately, Greg's plane crashes and he dies. Buddy feels really bad, especially because he knows that Greg had a wife and kids. After going through bouts of depression and drinking, he decides to contact the wife to see if she's doing all right.
All I can say here is that thank God Greg's wife Abby (Paltrow) is a looker, or else Buddy might have actually had to give some serious thought to sleeping with her. Can't the directors come up with a little complication? What if, just before they were going to do it, Abby told Buddy, "My vagina is infected" or she introduced one of her kids, who happened to have a dangling eyeball. I mean, you've gotta to feel pretty damn guilty about killing a guy to go out with his widow when she has a kid with a dangling eyeball.
To spread the word about this Bounce review on Twitter.To get instant updates of Mr. Cranky reviews, subscribe to our RSS feed.