"Catch and Release" is like that annoying relative who claims he just needs a bed for the night and then two weeks later you're still asking him when he's going to leave.

This film overstays its welcome, making one question whether it was ever really welcome at all. Such is the feeling produced by movies that try too hard, go nowhere, and use musical interludes to push their plots forward because the craft of storytelling has been jettisoned in favor of blatant commercialism. Selling soundtrack albums is just as important as making the movie.

We meet Gray Wheeler (Jennifer Garner) at the funeral of her fiancé. In another life, I might be willing to admit that this is an interesting start to a movie. She's depressed and doesn't know what to do. She heads upstairs to the bathroom and hides in the shower to get away from it all. Her fiancé's best friend Fritz (Timothy Olyphant) and some woman then duck into the bathroom and they make out while Gray listens, appalled.

From there we descend into romcom hell. Director Susannah Grant, who wrote "Erin Brockovich" among other things, treats the audience to an array of clichéd characters including Sam (Kevin Smith), Dennis (Sam Jaeger) and Maureen (Juliette Lewis). Fritz fills the role of the new, interesting guy who's not what he seems. Dennis is boring, pathetic guy. Maureen is the dumb but sweet girl. Sam is the fat, funny, I-never-stop-eating guy. I mean, seriously, does Kevin Smith's obvious weight problem need to be emphasized by his constant trips to the fridge? Why not emphasize Timothy Olyphant's anorexia by showing him smoking all the time? It's hard to believe that somebody who used to be edgy, like Smith, pitched his self-respect right out the window just to try his hand at acting.

Naturally, Gray and Fritz's mutual mourning is reaffirmed through sexual intercourse because this is what you do after your fiancé/best friend dies. That's followed by some musical interlude, which I'm sorry, is the worst chick-flick convention there is. One musical interlude is fine, but when they start lining up like mediocre crooners at an American Idol audition, you want to take a couple of boat horns and blow your eardrums out.

"Catch and Release" doesn't just deserve to be tossed back; it needs to be beaten against the side of the boat first.