Caught

Bomb Rating: 

There's a small revelation at the beginning of the filmthat Joe has a bad heart. From that point on, the movie is just one big death watch.

This is one of those movies where the filmmakers came up with thetitle before they figured out how to put film in the camera. Somebody thought, "Hey, let's make a movie about a fish shop owner and his wife who cheats on him and call it 'Caught'! Then after we're done with that movie we can make the one about the computer geek who fulfills his dream to race Indy cars and call it 'Hard Drive'!" I'll bet the idea of a special scratch n' sniff promotion at Long John Silver's was bandied about too.

Joe (Edward James Olmos) is the New York fish market owner, Betty (Maria Conchita Alonso) is his wife, and Nick (Arie Verveen) is the homeless guy who wanders into the fish shop one day and fills dual roles as Betty's secret lover and Joe's surrogate son. Joe's real son is Danny (Steven Schub), who's gone off to Hollywood to become a comedian but returns to New York to make sure the film's title retains its second meaning.

This film begins to implode when Danny shows up and starts calling Maria Conchita "mommy." How old was she when she had him? Ten? I'm also getting a little wary of all these homeless guys stomping into various domiciles and bedding lonely babes faster than Julio Iglesias. I think I'll go out and find me a cardboard box and a bottle of Mad Dog and get that harem I've always wanted.

There's a small revelation at the beginning of the film that Joe has a bad heart. From that point on, the movie is just one big death watch. Is Joe going to drop dead cutting fish? Or is he going to drop dead jogging? Why can't important characters have inflated intestines or gangrenous cysts?

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