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Caned Man Limping
It's about the human tragedy of corporal punishment in Singapore.
It stars Jackie Chan, who incidentally does all his own stunts.
Sally Struthers gives the performance of her life during the climactic if cliche' "solemn march to the bamboo pole" scene: "Please, please don't cane my baby! A civilized society only uses canes for sugar."
Danny DeVito is the executioner: "So whoever said I was civilized? Hand over the cane, lady, or you're next."
Ride the right-or-wrong roller coaster of the righteous as Law and Order vie with the Sanctity of the Gluteus Maximus for the Moral High Ground.
Witness the aftermath of the brutish cane, and ask yourself deeply philosophical questions: "Is all that limping worth it?" "I wonder how long it takes that waffle-shaped indentation to go away?" "Does caning really deter crime?" "Boxers or briefs? [or maybe neither for the first couple of weeks?]"
And finally, just as Dead Man Walking left you frowning and rubbing your chin as you left the theater, Caned Man Limping promises to leave you grimacing and rubbing your behind as you watch the credits roll -- preferably while standing.
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