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George and his pals have left the mess in the corridor for the cook to pick up.
But the turkey isn't dead - oh, no, it's not!
He bolts upright - takes stock of his surroundings, and takes a look at his mangled body.
"I am dead," he assures himself. "And yet - my mind and body have not quit. I am undead." The turkey staggers to its turkey feet and wobbles a few paces. He takes a deep breath and stands tall.
"I am stronger," the turkey smirks to himself. "I am invulnerable. There are three sets of eyes I intend to peck out. I AM TURKEY, HEAR ME GOBBLE."
It is a black day for men named after slang for a woman's pubes.
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