Dracula 2: Ascension

Bomb Rating: 

This is the sequel to "Dracula 2000". How the filmmakers figured the sequel to "Dracula 2000" should be called "Dracula II" is anybody's guess. Shouldn't it be "Dracula 2003" or whenever the hell the film was made? Makes more sense, doesn't it?

Jason Scott Lee plays an Italian priest named Uffizi who hunts down vampires and decapitates them. Now, you're probably wondering how anybody casting this movie might figure that an Asian actor would be appropriate for the role of an Italian priest. I'm wondering the same thing. However, if you can find me an Asian person who's named Uffizi, I'll stop complaining about it.

The premise of the film is that a bunch of medical students get hold of a vampire and are going to examine his blood and figure out the secret to immortality. It seems like a reasonable plan, except anybody who's watching knows they're all going to die, so whatever they do doesn't really matter much.

There's actually more curious casting in addition to Jason Scott Lee, so perhaps this is just some kind of perverted consistency. Craig Sheffer, last seen in "A River Runs Through It" as far as I can remember, plays Professor Lowell, who's stricken with cerebral palsy. Craig is in a wheelchair and has one hand curled up in a funny position. I checked to see if I could curl my hand up like Craig's and indeed I could. Nice acting!

Roy Scheider is also in the picture, for about ten total seconds, which is enough to give him above-the-line credit. If only the filmmakers had thought to have one of their actors run across the screen with a picture of Marlon Brando or Tom Cruise, they could have probably given them above-the-line credit too.

Beware, "Dracula III" is already in the works.

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