Here's a very simple message for Hollywood: Vince Vaughn and sincerity mix about as well as Britney Spears and parenting skill. Quite frankly, I'd think that if any producer with an ounce of common sense, making a schmaltzy holiday movie that predictably turns from a slightly mean-spirited comedy into a feel-good, syrupy family film, would have Vince Vaughn right next to, oh, Don Rickles on his or her list to star.

Why? Because Vaughn is a smart ass, punkwad, class A dick. Even if you think the guy is funny, one thing is for sure, there's no Vince Vaughn character that you've ever truly given a single shit about. Why? Because every character Vaughn has ever played resembles a frat boy who's rubbed his shit finger in one too many noses. So Vaughn plays the neglected brother of Santa Claus. Who cares? So Fred (Vaughn) had a hard childhood. Who cares? So Fred becomes the solution to Santa's (Paul Giamatti) failing business model. Who cares? So Fred, Santa, and Mother Claus (Kathy Bates) all reconcile at the end. Who cares? It's Vince frickin' Vaughn.

The irony of Vaughn's casting is that it very much symbolizes the cold heart at the center of this film, which views Christmas as nothing more than a corporate scam. While X-mas, like Vaughn, is another thing I really couldn't give a crap about, the characterization of Christmas in this film is absolutely soulless. I mean, wasn't Christmas once the celebration of the birth of Jesus Christ? In "Fred Claus", the North Pole is under siege by an efficiency expert, Clyde (Kevin Spacey), who will shut down the whole place unless Santa and the elves meet their quotas.

So Santa is nothing more than a cog in the corporate machine. Hey kids, don't forget, celebrate Christmas and feed the corporate monster! And this isn't just the subtext of "Fred Claus", it's a direct extension of a movie that's basically about an asshole who lives in a world of assholes. Of course, even though he's an asshole, he still has a hot girlfriend (Rachel Weisz) who loves him for no reason known to man. Predictably, Fred's line of work involves repossession. He wants to open his own business, but doesn't have the money. That's where Santa comes in. Fred calls him for a loan, a loan we assume he never intends to pay back.

Fred heads for the North Pole where he meets the head elf, Willie (John Michael Higgins) and Santa's Little Helper, Charlene (Elizabeth Banks), whose main function is to walk around in her low-cut Christmas blouse and keep the male elves excited. It certainly works on Willie, whose name was apparently given to him to remind us about his character's focus. Getting Willie into Charlene's pants is a subplot. The bigger question is what idiot tossed in a hot chick into a PG movie about Christmas, subtlely implying that the helping part may be giving Santa fluffers in the back?

Ultimately the message of "Fred Claus" is that all of us, even Santa, live to serve our corporate masters. Of course, at least Santa seems to be benefiting financially. Those elves are pure slave labor.

Give the finger to your corporate masters and refuse to see "Fred Claus".