Galaxy Quest

Bomb Rating: 

What's most infuriating about this film is that somebody is forcing me to spend two hours following Tim Allen around. Allen is so full of himself he sprays his ego around like a male cat with a urinary tract infection.

If you're suffering from low self-esteem, there are a number of tried and true ways to make yourself feel better. Parking in the handicapped spot is always a good one, as is passing out phony twenty dollar bills to the homeless. However, if you're really desperate to remind yourself that you're not the most pathetic person on the face of the earth, attend a Star Trek or Star Wars convention. You'll walk away feeling like the Lord of the Universe.

Since screwing with the handicapped and the homeless isn't exactly a great idea for a feature film (or is it?), the filmmakers of "Galaxy Quest" chose to belittle the "Star Trek" phenomena. The idea is that, many years after the cancellation of the original show, the cast of "Galaxy Quest" is still making a living doing conventions, and the Commander, actor Jason Nesmith (Tim Allen) is still stealing the spotlight from Gwen DeMarco (Sigourney Weaver), Alexander Dane (Alan Rickman), Fred Kwan (Tony Shalhoub) and Tommy Webber (Daryl Mitchell).

Comfortably resting in the bowels of their lives, the actors are approached by real aliens who think the show is a "historical document." They are whisked into outer space where they're asked to fight a real space battle in a real space ship against the evil Sarris (Robin Sachs). Note that the freaky aliens are the ones who think the show is real. So, in other words, if you're so into "Star Trek" or "Star Wars" that you think it's real, you're a freaky alien.

Ultimately, what's most infuriating about this film is that somebody is forcing me to spend two hours following Tim Allen around. Allen is so full of himself he sprays his ego around like a male cat with a urinary tract infection. Now that his wife has begun to sag noticeably, Allen (a la Kevin Costner) has divorced her after double digit years together to chase younger tail. "Galaxy Quest" is a lovely reminder of Hollywood's "kick 'em when they're down" philosophy of life.

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