George of the Jungle

Bomb Rating: 

Although I don't take kindly to the accusations of politicians and zealots who spout on about what a terrible influence films are on youth (in fact, I prefer to think of those maggots as "media whores"), I do think this Disney movie has crossed the line to the point where even Buddhists may want to consider boycotting it.

Coming out of the theater after "George of the Jungle," I watched a little boy take great pride in running into a wall at full speed and falling to the floor. George's (Brendan Fraser) schtick, as you may well know, is that he swings into trees. I can only surmise that many of his impressionable fans will soon die in freak zoo accidents after wandering into the gorilla cage to play with the "talking monkeys."

This film is the latest chapter in Disney's ongoing effort to pervert nature into some kind of stuffed-animal theme park. Perhaps it's no wonder that recent news reports have detailed the deaths of young children at the paws of wild animals -- the tykes are running off into our national parks looking for cute Simba and becoming lion chow. Now with "George of the Jungle" and its menagerie of chess-playing apes, stick-fetching elephants and wrestling lions, natural selection may be seriously accelerated.

For confirmation that this dumbing-down of the human race is complete, one need look no further than Brendan "Encino Man" Fraser, who's built a career on playing the missing link. He also starred in "Airheads" as another intellectually-handicapped person. One gets the impression his readings for Hamlet have been less than spectacular. Suddenly this guy is the role model for every kid under five, something that would probably give even Darwin pause.

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