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That's right... a sequel... not a prequel. This is Episode 7... what happened AFTER "Return of the Jedi".
We see Chewbacca going off to work in the morning wearing a suit and tie... carrying his briefcase. His wife Malla kisses him. Son Lumpy is happy because it's a snow day, and he doesn't have to go to school! He goes out and plays in the snow for a little bit but soon grows tired of the cold and goes back in the house where Malla is watching "The Today Show".
We see Matt Lauer interviewing some of the Ewoks. The Ewoks have become major celebrities due to their help in kicking the evil Empire's ass. However, the Rebel Force has been long forgotten. It's just the Ewoks who get movie deals, book deals, record deals, talk show appearances, etc. Malla is pissed off telling Lumpy how Chewy had risked his life for many many years before the Ewoks got involved in the struggle... she goes out to fight City Hall. She wants them to erect a monument dedicated to her dear husband in the Town Square!
Meanwhile, Lumpy surfs through the channels to see what else is on. "Martha Stewart Living" is on. She has Jar-Jar Binks hog-tied on her kitchen counter. She smashes him over the head with a croquet mallet. She then cuts his head off. Stuffs bread crumbs up Jar-Jar's ass and shoves him into the oven... cooking him for Thanksgiving Dinner. It's a good thing.
Lumpy changes the channel. A pregnant "Princess" Leia is on "The Jerry Springer Show". Since her planet had been destroyed in Episode 4, there was no longer a place where she could be a princess. She had to become a waitress in a sleazy diner. She and Han got married and had six children. On this particular day, she has something to confess to husband, Han Solo. Turns out that before she and Luke found out they were brother and sister, they'd had sex. And, now, she's not sure if her eldest child is Han's or Luke's. Han starts crying. Luke walks out from a sound-proof booth. Han starts beating the crap out of him while Leia pleads, "Can't we all just get along?"
Lumpy changes the channel again. We now see footage of Malla outside City Hall. She's burning her bra atop the stairs of the building... why she owns a bra since none of the wookies wear clothes we'll never know.
Lumpy changes the channel once again. We now see C-3PO on Dr. Laura saying how he and R2D2 are trying to adopt a child. She verbally rips C-3PO to shreds saying that he's evil and more likely to sexually molest small kitchen appliances than anyone else since he's a "technological defect". He whips out a gun and blows her brains out! He is placed under arrest and sentenced to die.
R2D2 jumps into a neighbor's swimming pool killing himself by rusting to death!
The mayor declares that a monument dedicated to Chewbacca can be erected in the town square... plus, Chewy's birthday becomes a national holiday.
Bea Arthur works in a bar. She sings "My Heart Will Go On" as the closing credits roll.
The end.
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