The Hot Chick

Bomb Rating: 

Harvard graduate Tom Brady directs this film, which is likely to cause alumni everywhere to send back their diplomas after seeing it.

I guess Rob Schneider's entire career is going to be comprised of fish-out-of-water roles. Look! It's Rob playing a sexy male prostitute. Look! It's Rob pretending to be an animal. Look! It's Rob pretending to be an 18-year-old girl. Look! It's Rob pretending to be a comedian. This sort of typecasting happens when you're incapable of any level of acting that requires actual talent or subtlety -- or you simply have a personality disorder.

Harvard graduate Tom Brady directs this film, which is likely to cause alumni everywhere to send back their diplomas after seeing it and the university to be discredited. On the other hand, perhaps Tom got his B.A. in Janitorial Services and spent an inordinate amount of time perusing scribblings on the bathroom walls.

Stuck-up high school student Jessica Spencer (Rachel McAdams) finds some magical piece of jewelry and wakes up one day in the body of Clive (Rob Schneider). Clive wakes up in the body of Jessica, but we don't follow that story (probably because Clive would have stood in one place and played with his breasts for the rest of his life). I don't know about anyone else, but I don't take any perverse pleasure in watching Schneider run around in women's clothing. Maybe that's something Rob and Tom enjoy in their spare time, but I don't really want to hear about it. Though she looks like a 30-year-old male lowlife, Jessica must convince her best friend, April (Anna Faris), that she's really just trapped inside a lowlife's body.

The next hour of "The Hot Chick" consists of Schneider looking ridiculous in a variety of ensembles and lamenting the discomfort of tight underwear. Predictably, Jessica must also contend with the presence of having a penis that April and all her friends want to see, peeing standing up, fending off the bitch who's stolen her boyfriend, and just trying to find where Clive is and what he's doing with her body. Certainly, when that inevitable switch back finally happens, one imagines Jessica taking a long, necessary shower. I had to take a long shower myself just to clean the grime from spending 90 minutes in the gutter with "The Hot Chick."

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