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what is your fondest memory as a kid?
When Jill McDonnough kissed me in the first grade.
what was the worst accident you ever got into when you were a kid?
No really bad ones. Lots of stitches, though.
what did you want to be when you grew up?
I wanted to be a locomotive engineer because of the TV show CASEY JONES.
are you that now?
No.
why/why not?
Because I discovered my true talent, my calling in life, and I do that now.
what kind of kid were you?
Quiet.
what would you tell the adult self if you were to go forward in time to the present as a kid?
Nothing. What the fuck did I know when I was a kid?
what would your adult self tell the kid if you were to go back in time to visit yourself?
I'd tell myself not to be afraid to get involved with women. I'd tell myself where my talents lay. And I'd tell myself not to worry about what the other kids think. Just be who you are. And invest in Microsoft.
what was your least favorite vegetable?
Spinach. Still is.
your most favorite food?
Potato chip sandwiches.
your favorite toy?
My James Bond Aston Martin.
how did you discover about the birds and the bees?
Well the first one to tell me about sex was this local kid, a greaser, kind of a pseudo-hood. I remember him in my front yard telling me about how you get a girl pregnant by fingering her.
when did you stop believeing in the easter bunny/santa clause/tooth fairy/leprechans/the thing in the closet? (you do realize they aren't real, right? except the thing in the closet. it's still there. it just moved under your bed.)
God, I don't remember. First or second grade, maybe. Probably earlier. And I thought the thing in the closet turned into you.
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