Legally Blonde

Bomb Rating: 

Apparently, some actual sorority chicks ducked out of Pottery Barn just long enough to pen this simple movie.

The point of this movie is to break stereotypes, particularly those about blondes being stupid. The irony of the film is that it pretty much perpetuates those stereotypes with its silly storyline and ability to wrap up complicated legal plot points by having main character Elle Woods (Reese Witherspoon) get lucky.

Of course, I do not use the phrase "get lucky" to invoke more irony. I simply mean that Elle doesn't solve her big case or win new friends through intelligence. She just happens to be in the right place and say the right thing at the right time. She blurts out a bunch of crap about perms and suddenly the key witness in the murder trial Elle is defending tells everyone that she actually shot her father, then covers her mouth with her hand as though she'd made a boo-boo. For all the smarts that required, Elle might as well have spent the trial crouched under the judge's bench.

Apparently, some actual sorority chicks ducked out of Pottery Barn just long enough to pen this simple movie. I presume they intended to prove that they have a bit more going for them than screechy laughs, designer clothes and twitches that scream "my crotch is open for business" like hyenas in heat. However, it might have given just a smidge more legitimacy to their efforts to not have Harvard Law School students utter such sentences as: "That's where he gets a lot of his legal briefs from", "She was seen", and, in response, "Seen by who?"

And frankly, while I'm sure there's a blonde sorority girl somewhere on the planet who isn't a complete idiot, generally speaking, they're just not that bright. First of all, they couldn't get through college without the purchased social support of a sorority, which automatically implies a certain level of sheltered witlessness. Besides, I personally have seen blondes do the following: When given nineteen cents in change by a cashier, one blonde looked up, and said with complete seriousness: "Nineteen? Wow, that's pretty close to twenty." When a sorority-type at a Starbucks was told to use the unisex bathroom around the corner, she responded: "What if I did a girl once?" Yes, folks, these shining examples are supposedly the best and brightest our country has to offer.

Don't expect to ever hear me say this again, but it might be beneficial for all parties involved if this particular stereotype were left unexamined.

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