The Legend of Zorro

Bomb Rating: 

I'd rent a burro and ride hundreds of miles to see "Zorro."

Special guest reviewer: Mr. Smiley!

Mr. Smiley's rating:
If I had a third thumb, it'd be up too!

If it hadn't been for all the wonderful movies that have made me smile over the last seven years, I would have been horribly depressed had I realized that so much time had passed between the first Zorro movie starring Antonio Banderas and this one. Fortunately, by the time I realized so much time had gone by, I knew this movie would be coming out and I just had to flash my pearlies like a kid auditioning for a role in a toothpaste commercial.

But to be honest, the more I thought about it, the more I thought that seven-year break must have been a good thing for both Antonio Banderas, who plays Don Alejandro de la Vega -- otherwise known as Zorro -- and Catherine Zeta-Jones, who plays his wife, Elena de la Vega. Imagine if those two had not had those seven years apart. Catherine couldn't have had her beautiful children with Michael Douglas and spent all that quality time with him and Antonio would have missed out on being a husband to the beautiful Melanie Griffith and their super-smart kids. So sometimes seven years off is a reason to smile.

In this movie, unlike the happy marriages of the two real-life stars, the marriage of Zorro and Elena appears to be on the rocks. Of course, we all know it's a ruse because everybody loves Zorro and since everybody loves Zorro, Elena must love Zorro, so that fact that she pretends not to love Zorro is obviously just a cover to infiltrate the underhanded dealings of Armand (Rufus Sewell).

Another really spectacular, wonderful thing about this movie is that, despite their differences, Zorro and Elena have obviously made sweet love and done what God intended sweet love to do and that's make a baby. Their kid, Joaquin, is so cute I just couldn't stop being happy for them. Not only is he cute, but he's tough and talented too. So naturally, he gets in the mix and helps the de la Vega family thwart evil, and of course, they do!

I'd rent a burro and ride hundreds of miles to see "Zorro."

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  • Special guest reviewer: Mr. Smiley!

    Mr. Smiley's rating:
    Fantastic! The feel good hit of the season!