Lucky Numbers

Bomb Rating: 

I don't know if playing a moron is John Travolta's way of apologizing for "Battlefield: Earth."

What irony that I should see this film after writing my "The Legend of Drunken Master" review, wherein I commented about what a shock it was that Jackie Chan's character was named something other than Jackie. Lisa Kudrow should take a hint from Chan's practice. Everyone of her movie characters ought to be called Phoebe. Why even bother with the pretense? In one movie we get Phoebe-light, then another we get Phoebe-droll. In this movie, it's Phoebe-dark. Any way you slice it, it's all Phoebe. With her acting range, Kudrow's next career may be herding amoebas.

This is a movie about three types of people: Dumb people, mean people, and greedy people. Russ Richards (John Travolta) is a weatherman who hooks up with lotto girl, Crystal Latroy (Kudrow), and decides to rig the lottery at the behest of Gig (Tim Roth), when debt collectors come calling on Richards, who's bought a Jaguar and a Snowmobile dealership. Unfortunately, there's no snow.

Things go horribly wrong because Russ is an imbecile and Crystal is a colossal, self-absorbed bitch. Gig's solution to every little problem is to call up his pal, Dale (Michael Rapaport), and have him off the problem. One of those problems turns out to be the boss (Ed O'Neill) at the station, and another is a lazy cop (Bill Pullman).

I don't know if playing a moron is John Travolta's way of apologizing for "Battlefield: Earth," but I kind of doubt it, since he's stated publicly that he intends to make a sequel. I say that until such time as he recognizes that movie as the mind-altering piece of trash that it was and swear to never refer to it or any sequels ever again, moviegoers everywhere should boycott any movie that he makes and refer to him only as Puttybrain Travolta.

To spread the word about this Lucky Numbers review on Twitter.

To get instant updates of Mr. Cranky reviews, subscribe to our RSS feed.
0 Comments

Like This Lucky Numbers Review? Vote it Up.

0

Rate This Movie:

Other Cranky Content You Might Enjoy

  • If Robert De Niro is such a damn good actor, why can't he learn how tocry?

  • This film really breaks new ground in Jackie Chan movies by giving Chan's character a name other than "Jackie." I suppose this required some extra preparation on Chan's part, but it was certainly a ni

  • While I'm positive Jackie Chan could beat the crap out of Pierce Brosnan, that doesn't make him James Bond.