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Dan: I'm glad that you've decided to stay. For the most part, the Crankizens are a great bunch, except for stray idiots, like Simon, Mr. Wonderful, and Pathetic Owl, or blatant offenders, like Hitler or Teabags.
The Rest of the Parody Writers: I thank you all for including me in each of the parodies. Wow, in two reviews I went from inexperienced grunt with a few idiots under his belt to vice-president. How much farther can I climb the ranks in one day? Maybe I'll be president by 10:00 PM, eh?
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