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WULFGAR010'S LOG, ENTRY 75329:
I returned to the shabby rooms that my sib Zero-Ten and I had rented. I gave the coded knock, and phrase that pays..."
WULFGAR010: "Every man must string his own bow..."
ZERO-TEN(muffled, through door):"...to fight the War in an Evil world..."
The door opened, and there stood my clone-sib; as ever, ‘Zero' was clad in black sweater, black trousers, and black combat boots...like a damn G.I. Joe Commando...
ZERO: I see that it was as I had predicted; he did not wish to listen.
WULFGAR010(wearily):Aye...an there's moore...(enters, shuts door behind him, and re-sets jury-rigged security system)...d'ye ‘member a verminous shite name o' InternationalHero?
ZERO: Yes; a mercenary, of low repute. Envious of others, capable of virtually any known perversion, keeps library book long after the due date...
WULFGAR010: Aye, tha's th' one. I caught him violatin' someone's prized poodle. He'd been hired tae shadow Richard, in order tae find ME.
I...persuaded...him tae part wi' THIS...
WULFGAR010(VO): I gave the lad the ‘207' phone #. He utilised Namagomi's lap-top, accessed some files and sent a transmission via the "Black Star"-ScotIntel's secret spy-satellite.
010, one of our remaining (though missing) sibs, had made us a backdoor into the satellite, for our own purposes. The access was completely untraceable.
Within minutes, Zero had an answer.
ZERO: It is the phone number of a used bookstore, in a small town in north Maine. I've located a webpage associated with it.
The establishment specialises in science-fiction, fantasy, and spy- novels, wiyh a sideline in mysteries and cheesey American 70's adventure fiction.
WULFGAR010: An' SO?
ZERO: Look...
I looked at the screen. Featured prominently were several book-covers; CYBORG by Martin Caidin, NEUROMANCER, The Adventures of Cherry Delight, The EXECUTIONER, Sherlock Holmes' compiled tales, the entire line of BOND books, and THE CLONES...
A banner ran across the screen, stating "SPECIAL DISCOUNT RATES FOR INTERNATIONAL MEN AND MAMMAS OF MYSTERY, CLONES, AND BIONIC AGENTS! CLICK HERE FOR DETAILS!!!!!!!!! #:-)"
WULFGAR010: TELL me this is a bad joke...
ZERO: THERE, you see? You CAN enunciate properly when you wish.
I scowled at the boy, but neither his tone nor his expression gave credence to the idea that he was making anything BUT a dry, flat observation of fact.
More's the pity...
ZERO: I AM at a loss to see your dilemma.
WULFGAR010: This...thing is an obvious come-on, Boy. But who the Divil FROM?"
Zero examined the page, frowned, and began typing. He grunted, lost in thought, and seemed to be possessed by the damned infernal device.
He made a subdued sound of triumph after a half- hour or so.
ZERO: Encoded here is a message...it is two words, and a numeric code.
I read the words, my guts churning as I did; the first was ‘Masardis', and the second was...
WULFGAR010: THAT BASTARD!
"...HAIRHEAD"...
WULFGAR010: What the FOOK duzziz mean?!?
Zero: The numeric code is indicative of the existance of an audio file (types some more) THERE...
An unmistakable voice began to issue from the speakers of Namagomi's lap-top...
HAIRHEAD (tinnily): OK, you sheep-shagging haggis-chomper, click on the banner like a good chimp...oh, and I'm POSITIVE that you had to get someone else to decipher this for you.
I mean, you aren't a half- bad fighter, passable spy, and AMATEUR sleuth, but technology frightens you to DEATH. Fucking Luddite...'
...oh, don't forget to enter the passcodes...all THREE of them... (snicker)
Gotta LOVE sticky-notes..
WULFGAR010: HAIRHEAD...
(To be continued)
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