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Ya kiddies got too much damn time on yer hands, gol darnit! Isn't wastin' all yer time on this intornet websaht enuff ta keep ya'll happy?? NO! Ya all gotta pretend yer people yer not, too! People ya wish ya could be in real life if ya weren't such a crop o' pathetic losers! Ya kiddies nowadays don't get nuthin' worthwhile done. By the time I wuz yer age I had bitten the heads off chickens in all fifty states and had fathered eleven children with eleven different bearded ladies! Wut ya'll do, huh? Yak on yer fancy compooters 'bout how nobody understands ya and munch down on the eightieth new flavor of Doritos, dat's all.
Pissy says ya all ain't worth yer own weigh in fertilizer, and dat the minit ya'll realize it we'll all be dat much better off! Now quit yer yakkin' and go make Pissy a nice pot o' tea. Really calms the nerves after workin' one of those horrifyin' birthday parties, it does. All dem bloodthirsty little kids, armed wit' plastic knives and those goddamn Super Soakers filled wit bleach n' piss.... damn I'm gittin too old fer dis line o' work.
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