Mr. Wrong

Bomb Rating: 

After I saw this film, I wanted to drive my car into a tree.

Imagine that you go into a restaurant and order a Philly cheesesteak -- you know, the kind with the melted cheese over the sautéed onions and steak. When you're about halfway through the sandwich, you take a nice, big bite and out comes this long hair. You turn to the waitress and request some satisfaction and she says, "Why, there ain't no one else cooks but Joe Bob, and Joe Bob ain't got no hair." Skeptical, you request to see Joe Bob, so the waitress escorts you back to the kitchen where you see Joe Bob cooking away. Joe Bob is completely bald and has no facial hair. Joe Bob waves to you and you wave back and just as you're about to turn away, Joe Bob puts a greasy hand down his pants and takes a nice, long scratch. Picture that exact moment and you'll understand what it feels like to sit through this movie.

Mr. Cranky has been known to exaggerate now and again, but -- I kid you not -- after I saw this film, I wanted to drive my car into a tree. The film, like the title boyfriend (Bill Pullman), turns psychotic in less than fifteen minutes. When Marsha's (Ellen Degeneres) prince turns into a frog she's dumbfounded, and, frankly, so are we.

In "Mr. Wrong," director Nick Castle combines two things that don't go together: romantic comedy and an episode of Bugs Bunny. After directing this and the awful "Major Payne," I think Nick should be required to sit in on all the screenings of his next movie and take questions afterward, such as this one: "Can I beat the shit out of you in the parking lot, or should we get it over with here?"

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