You! Go see if there are any guns or ammunition in the baggage car! You and you! Go round up all the passengers and relieve all non-Arabs of their valuables. The rest of you, see if there are any of the infidel Turks on board.
What? Who are you? Are you English? What are you doing on this train in the middle of Arabia? Are you out of your mind? Do you not know that there is a war for Arab Independence going on? Oh, so you are a diplomat. I see. And what post were you assigned to? Zurich?! Mr. Carr, you do realize that you are in the middle of the desert of Arabia, and not central Europe? You should perhaps pay a little less attention to diplomatic functions at the embassy and more to geography. And you are.... Mr. Tzara. A diplomat as well? Dada? Sir, I would suggest that you refrain from any further insults if you desire to escape this unpleasant situation.
I see no recourse but to take you with us. I cannot possibly in good consequence leave the two of you here in the desert. Two ladies as well? You do like to live the adventurous life, do you not? Yes. Abdullah! Find four extra camels! It appears that we are having guests for dinner! Quiet, now! No time for questions. We must leave, and rather quickly. I shall answer your questions about who I am and what is happening in due time.
What unfortunate timing! The assault of Akaba is scheduled for next week, and I find that we now have ourselves houseguests!
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