Osmosis Jones

Bomb Rating: 

Kids can barely tolerate their parents when they're clean and acting rationally, so it's just a bit hard to believe that Frank's (Billy Murray) daughter still loves him despite the fact he doesn't shave and has pus and snot running down his face at all times. Where's Social Services when you really need them?

This disheveled appearance is the link the live-action and animated segments of this Farrelly brothers film, as animated characters battle for the health of Frank's body. Osmosis Jones (voice by Chris Rock), a white blood cell, is running around inside Frank with a cold pill named Drix (David Hyde Pierce), attempting to get rid of a threatening virus named Thrax (Laurence Fishburne). As this little drama plays out, Frank gets sicker and sicker and it's up to Osmosis to save him.

First of all, if Frank actually had anthrax, a common cold pill would have about as much effect as hurling a nerf ball at a charging elephant. What actually ails Frank is that he's really disgusting, like many of the fat people I had the misfortune of being wedged between during this particular showing. (By the way, exactly when does it occur to some of these people that perhaps ignoring the tub of popcorn and the 128 oz. soft drink might be a good thing?) While Frank isn't horribly fat, he must smell like a sewer. Unfortunately, cold pills don't cure that symptom either.

Ultimately, this was one of those films where the filmmakers spend an inordinate amount of time congratulating themselves on their own originality. Every time the film self-consciously segues from action to animation, you can practically hear the Farrelly brothers patting themselves on the back. Or, more likely, dusting off what is in fact a very old concept.

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