The Quest

Bomb Rating: 

Since "The Quest" is the hundredth or so movie about a man traveling to a foreign land to fight in a martial arts tournament, you'll be spared the stress of not knowing how it's going to end.

For years people have been stereotyping muscle-bound jocks like Jean-Claude Van Damme as brainless lumps of testosterone-driven fury. Then, periodically, some pectoral swell comes around and demonstrates that he can tie his shoes and balance his checkbook like a normal person. Thank God, Van Damme has decided to direct his first movie, "The Quest," and reaffirm our belief in broad, demeaning generalizations.

If you can ignore that the film is rated PG-13 to attract kids and teach them that beating the crap out of people can be life-affirming; that every time Van Damme falls a great distance he always lands on something soft; that the doors in the mysterious Buddhist temple open by themselves because, well, it's mysterious; then you just might enjoy yourself. After all, since "The Quest" is the hundredth or so movie about a man traveling to a foreign land to fight in a martial arts tournament, you'll be spared the stress of not knowing how it's going to end.

Imagine, Frank Dux and Jean-Claude Van Damme thought this up all by themselves. Their weight trainers must be very proud of them.

To spread the word about this The Quest review on Twitter.