Romy and Michele's High School Reunion

Bomb Rating: 

(Director David) Mirkin ought to be beaten for being the first to advance the notion that the '80s was a decade worthy of nostalgia.

The greatest gift some deranged "Friends" fan could give to the world is to come out of nowhere and slug Lisa Kudrow in the face. Perhaps then we'd get to see her produce some other expression besides that clueless "duh" look she's parlayed into fame and fortune on "Friends," on talks shows and now in films. She's like a broken car with one working gear.

At least somebody was smart enough to cast Lisa as an idiot, if that actually qualifies as a casting decision. Kudrow plays Michele to Mira Sorvino's Romy. When they get word about their high school reunion, they're chagrined to discover that they're both still stupid. Romy is employed as a receptionist while Michele is unemployed, spending her time designing bad clothing. They decide to go anyway, hoping to convince everyone that they're really successful.

Once he amasses enough material to fill the trailer, director David Mirkin switches to the old tactic of "distracting the audience from the story." This results in several pointless dance numbers and a dream sequence so long you'll think the Merry Pranksters have spiked the theater's water supply with LSD.

Not unlike my own high school reunion, this film made me sick. Mirkin ought to be beaten for being the first to advance the notion that the '80s was a decade worthy of nostalgia. That's not a sign of comic genius; it's a sign of Attention Deficit Disorder -- these particular "good old days" were only eight years ago. And no matter how much time passes, listening to songs like "Dance Hall Days," "Time After Time" and "Footloose" will never be considered a sign of nostalgia so much as a sign of dementia.