Seven

Bomb Rating: 

While I don't want to give anything away, here's the biggest shock of the movie (avert your eyes if you don't want to ruin it): Brad Pitt plays a handsome dumb guy.

If you've seen this film and "The Usual Suspects," an important and very distracting question looms: What's wrong with Kevin Spacey's leg? In both films, he limps constantly. Is this some recently discovered acting secret nobody knows about?

I spent the entire movie hoping that Detective Somerset (Morgan Freeman) would just shut the hell up for one second. He goes on and on about how there are no answers and how nobody cares. One second he's a cop; the next second he's Sartre. Director David Fincher doesn't help him much by having it rain all the time. Maybe Somerset isn't actually that cynical -- he's just really wet and grouchy.

While I don't want to give anything away, here's the biggest shock of the movie (avert your eyes if you don't want to ruin it): Brad Pitt plays a handsome dumb guy.

Ultimately, this whole movie rides on the ability of one delivery man to find his way into the middle of a field on the outskirts of a big city. It's a dangerous thing to pivot a movie on. Delivery guys have been known to take doughnut breaks. They've been known to get lost. Imagine, one wrong turn and there are Brad Pitt, Morgan Freeman and Kevin Spacey out in the middle of nowhere pontificating about the reliability of UPS and Federal Express instead of the seven deadly sins.

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