Sky High

Bomb Rating: 

I'm trying to figure out how, all of a sudden, within the span of two days, I've seen two movies featuring Lynda Carter. What exactly is going on here? Did the producers of one movie hear about the other movie and worry that they might miss out on the Wonder Woman nostalgia Carter's appearance would inevitably bring? Is she dying of some mysterious disease?

Director Mike Mitchell's previous film was "Surviving Christmas," one of the worst films of 2004, though admittedly not as bad as "Christmas with the Kranks." This is probably the only decent thing I can say about Mike Mitchell: At least he didn't make "Christmas with the Kranks."

For the most part, this is a live action version of "The Incredibles," except that the focus is mostly on the kid, in this case Will Stronghold (Michael Angarano), and not the parents, The Commander (Kurt Russell) and Jetstream (Kelly Preston). It's essentially the boring parts of every teenage angst film ever made only with lots of superhero jokes. It really is the sort of movie that gets made by letting computers figure out what will sell, and then using mathematical guidelines to map out all the plot points.

Much like Harry Potter entering Hogwarts, Will Stronghold enters the school with no powers, despite the fact that his parents are the two greatest superheroes on the planet. Since many other kids have already developed their powers, Will feels nervous and awkward. What's worse, the kids are quickly sorted into groups of heroes and sidekicks, and Will, much to his chagrin, is tagged a sidekick and forced to hang out with all the loser kids in school.

From there, "Sky High" becomes like every other stupid Disney film aimed at teenagers: predictable. Will falls for the popular girl, Gwen (Mary Elizabeth Winstead), gets his powers, starts hanging out with the heroes, shuns the sidekicks, and eventually learns about the power of love (as in love everyone, even the losers). In the end, he's called on to save everything and everyone.

If "Sky High" were a superhero, it'd be a "Wondertwin." The lame one. That's how bad it is.

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