You’d think that after making “Donnie Darko”, director Richard Kelly would leave the idea of time travel behind him and move onto another idea because, well, that’s what good filmmakers do to prove they have creativity and talent – they try new things. Kelly appears hooked on the same concept. I mean, it’s kind of like wearing a Klingon suit to consecutive “Star Trek” conventions. The whole word is laughing at you the first time you wear it, but then the second time you wear it, even your fellow Trekkers are laughing at you.

To watch “Southland Tales” and realize that this is what Kelly has been working on for the last five or so years is like stepping in shit and having some bum tell you that you’ve just demolished his life’s work. Five years for this thing? Just think, in another five years, Kelly might actually be able to hire the other three current or former actors from “Saturday Night Live” who don’t star in this fiasco.

On its surface, “Southland Tales” appears to be a near-future tale of Boxer Santaros (Dwayne Johnson), an actor who’s gone missing, but turns up in the middle of the desert without his memory. This is merely a small springboard into what is a barfload of ideas that fill the film, kind of like a freshman college student trying to write his doctoral thesis.

One humorous irony of this film is that it takes place in the summer of 2008 and by the time anybody actually sees this thing, it’ll be later than that and it’ll be that much more incomprehensible. For what it’s worth, Kelly’s near future is a clash between the right-wing police state and the ultra left-wing neo-Marxists. Among the neo-Marxists are Cyndia Pinziki (Nora Dunn), Zora Carmichaels (Cheri Oteri), and Veronica Mung (Amy Poehler). C’mon, how seriously is anybody going to take the idea of Marxism with “SNL” alums as their torch-bearers? The police state is dominated by “USIdent”, which is a combination of monitoring, identification, and the like.

A key to understanding the film comes when Boxer learns that he’s been transported into this future and split into two people. This has relevance for cop Roland Taverner (Seann William Scott), who thinks he has a twin brother, but later figures out that his brother is really his past self. In keeping with the whacko nature of the film, Sarah Michelle Gellar plays a porn star, Jon Lovitz plays a psycho cop, and Wallace Shawn plays Baron Von Westphalen, who’s developed some kind of power system based on ocean waves. Oh, just in case you were wondering, Sarah Michelle Gellar doesn’t appear naked.

The film is self-aware in a way that makes one want to vomit. It’s that sort of “hey look at me, I can reference every cool film ever made in my cool film!” Thus, there are David Lynch references, “Kiss Me Deadly” references, “Star Wars” references, “Big Lebowski” references, and about as many others as you could imagine given the self-referential nature of those films and the coolness factor entailed in mentioning them.

Here’s what I think is actually going on: the only seemingly real character in the film is Taverner, and it appears that he’s returned from Iraq after killing a friend (Justin Timberlake) in a friendly fire incident. The entire film is the battle between two halves of his psyche: the half that wants to protect him from the horror of what’s happened and the half that wants to commit suicide. Thus, everything else is part of Taverner’s imagination. This is largely born out in the end when the Taverners join hands in a very “Repo Man” like moment.

As one friend said upon exiting this film: “just because you can fuck with people, does that mean you should?” The answer isn’t so much no as it’s “prove you can tell a story before you go trying to be the philosopher king.” I mean, “Donnie Darko” wasn’t all that coherent. Try telling a coherent story before you go trying to become the next great filmmaker. Know what I mean? Like, try learning to ride a bike before you go driving that Indy 500 car. Try spelling your words correctly before you attempt to write a novel.

If one thing is clear from “Southland Tales”, Richard Kelly’s opinion of himself is a lot higher than anyone else’s.