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FRIDAY THE THIRTEENTH PART TWELVE JASON VS. THE SPICE GIRLS PART 5: BLOOD AND FIRE
(Fade in on the charred wreckage of the store. Melted, ruined antiques and weird chemical residue from all the junk food are mixed together. As the camera moves up,we see HENRY standing still in the road,staring at the burned-out husk.)
(He then hears a noise off to his left. He stares down the road,and sees the limo slowly coming down the road. He gasps,and then runs into the woods.)
INTERIOR(limo)
(SCARY is still driving,and BABY has come back to the front. She's trying to clean the lumpy skinfat,blood,and other stuff off of her dress.)
SCARY(seeing remains of store) Shit...
BABY
Looks like y'should've bought that lunchbox,huh?
SCARY
Guess so.
BABY
Let's have a toast.
SCARY(picks up Twinkie,gives it to Baby) A toast to that old,charred fart.
(Baby takes her Twinkie,and unwraps it)
SCARY(staring at Twinkie) These things have a half-life of 300 years,did you know that?
BABY
No way.
SCARY
It's true. This thing is going to outlive us if we don't eat it.
BABY
All that'll be left are Hostess products and cockroaches. And then the cockroaches will inherit the Earth...
SCARY
Cheers.
BABY
Cheers.
(They toast with the Twinkies. Scary takes a huge bite of hers,and Baby takes a small one.)
BABY
Scary,I've been thinking. What that guy said about us.
(Scary doesn't answer)
BABY
I mean-
(She looks over at Scary,who has the weirdest look on her face. She seems to be having trouble breathing. She suddenly lurches forward,and coughs. A huge spray of blood rockets from her throat and splatters the window.
BABY
Scary? SCARY?
(Scary manages to look at her. Blood runs down her chin, onto the seat. Onto the remains of the Twinkie. With each breath,more blood spits out of her mouth. She gasps loudly, and then she points at the Twinkie.)
(BABY looks at Scary's Twinkie. Then she looks at her own,and realizes that there's something sticking out of the cream filling. She cautiously plucks it out,and stares at it.)
BABY
Oh,my God...
(Between her first two fingers is a white-soaked razor blade.)
BABY(whisper) That old bastard. (she turns to SCARY)
BABY
Out of the car!
CUT to the other three Spice Girls,standing on the road, covered head to toe with various forms of gore. They are silently watching Baby performing a pathetic parody of the Heimlich Maneuver on SCARY.)
POSH
You're doing it wrong...
(Scary suddenly slumps over,and falls onto the road.)
BABY
You can't DIE!(Kneels down)
BABY
C'mon,Scary...(singing)"Tell ya what I want what I really really want..."...take it!
SCARY
Juh...
BABY
That's it!
POSH
I told you we should have written that part.
SCARY
Juhhhh...
BABY
What,Posh?
POSH
We NEVER actually clarify what it is the "I" in the song
wants...
SCARY
Juuuhh...
BABY(turns to the other three) I told you she'd be okay!
SCARY
JUUUUUHHH!
(Baby turns around in time to catch a huge gob of thick and chunky blood right in the face. SCARY slumps onto the blacktop and dies. A moment later,she posthumously rips a loud,long fart.)
(The four Spice Girls stand silently on the road,their heads down as the camera swoops above them. A crack of thunder fills the air.)
FADE OUT
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