Switchblade Sisters

Bomb Rating: 

Next to pornos, it's just the kind of movie one would expect a video clerk to be watching at two in the morning as he realizes what a loser he is.

If you really want to see what Quentin Tarantino is made of, go watch "Switchblade Sisters," a 1975 offering from Director Jack Hill that's being re-released by Tarantino's new company, Rolling Thunder Pictures. As we all have heard, Quentin worked long hours in a video rental store before making it as a deity. Next to pornos, it's just the kind of movie one would expect a video clerk to be watching at two in the morning as he realizes what a loser he is for trying to "make it in show business" by climbing up the industry's effluent pipe.

Here's a quick lesson in how to be the leader of a female gang in the seventies: First, run around in tight clothing like Lace (Robbie Lee), carry a knife and talk a lot with your teeth clenched. The madder you get, the more tightly you clench your teeth. Then, in your best Kathy Ireland voice you say things like "I'm gonna cut your heart out" and "Get her, girls!" real loud.

The next thing you have to do is hook up with the leader of the male gang. Lace hooks up with Dominic (Asher Bauner), the leader of the Silver Blades. Each of the Silver Blades looks like a badly cloned version of Vinnie Barbarino from "Welcome Back, Kotter." When Lace suspects a new girl, Maggie (Joanne Nail), of boppin' her man, she tries to off her and regain control of her girls.

All the Vinnie Barbarinos look like middle-aged men who agreed to act in a movie so they could get to feel the young actresses once in a while. Unbelievably, Hill sets the film in a high school and wants us to believe that the "Student Patrol" is the Barbarinos' front. Remember, this film was made in 1975 -- if you're dumb enough to pay money to see it in a theater when it's available on video then you should make an appointment to be sterilized. Then again, if you're dumb enough to see it at all, maybe you should be working in a video rental store too.

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